Allergic Girl

It was time to return Allergic Girl to the library.  I've renewed my loan a few times already and I was only half-way through it.  I think I had trouble getting through it because I felt a little dismissed since I won't die from my allergies.  (I'll just wish I had!)  While I can feel for her life-threatening allergy issues, I had a hard time getting around that information to find what was important to me.

But there is a lot of great information in the book and I did scan through the second half of the book before returning it.

• Have an ally but still be responsible.
• Trust but verify--don't trust blindly.
• Bring safe food to catered events.
• Eat like a (food-allergy) athlete.
• Focus on the focus of the event (not me!)
• Take food allergies seriously, but see lightness while ensuring safety; see the silliness or absurdity in situations.
• Laugh when I get the eye roll or pity; the power of those expressions evaporates.
• It's okay to walk away and not eat.
• Make sure that fear keeps you safe, doesn't take over and paralyze me.
• Note what food can do to me and have the capacity to love what food can do for you.
• Food is not the enemy and is not scary: food is food.
• Allergies are not me, just part of who I am.

She talked about types of friends:

• Always ask you to pick (can be a lot of pressure)
• Try to support you
• Advocates for you: the food allergy deputy
• Goes too far: the food allergy bulldog, puts a lot of pressure on you, makes you feel guilty, puts the focus on you relentlessly

"One cannot have too large a party.  A large party secures its own amusement."  Mr. Weston, Emma, Jane Austen

You can't control everything but should take reasonable measures.  She gives tips for eating out, including pre-contacting a manager, bringing chef cards.  She discusses cross contamination, replacing pots and utensils.  (Which my husband would call paranoid, rather than reasonable measures.)

She talks about early on, having reactions and didn't know that it wasn't normal.  I'm sure I started that way and it got worse over time.  She says that we are passionate about food because we need to be.  It is a little hard to reconcile what I have to do (I don't care if you think I have a choice--I don't think I have a choice to eat stuff that makes me sick) and how I want to live...It seems hard to "Go boldly" when I'm being so careful and always have to be so aware of things that everyone else takes for granted.

Say your weak thing in a strong voice."  Carrie Fisher in Wishful Thinking