DRAFT TODAY, POST TOMORROW: Some posts may be in draft status until I (aka procrastinator extraordinaire) get around to posting them.

Monday, April 30, 2012

Bras and curry.

You might wonder how bras and curry go together.  You're so silly!  Of course they don't go together!

Today was our soup throwdown at work, and my soup was very popular so I had none to bring home for dinner.  That's okay; it would have sat in the car for a couple hours--ew.  When I left work, I headed to the mall to use my Victoria's Secret coupons that expire today.  I asked to be measured and she said 34C, that 32D would work but might feel tight.  So I tried on a bunch of styles and found a few that I liked and happened to be on the 2 for just less than $50 discount.  I bought four and they let me use 2 coupons, and get a free hiphugger, so I spent under $100 and I have enough bras to get through a week now.

When I left the mall, a guy called to me because he saw my bag.  He gave me a $10 gift card that he wasn't going to use (got it with his "friend" who he wasn't friends with anymore) so I went back in to see if there was something I had to have that I hadn't bought yet.  Unfortunately, this store did not have the undies I like (have they been discontinued?) and I didn't want to buy another bra yet until I've had time to see how these feel at the end of the day.  So I gave it to a couple that was just getting into line.  I was so tired; I just wanted to go home.

When I got home, it was late and I was hungry.  (Get outta my way!)  I decided to start some rice while I found a curry recipe (Paleo, but I had it with rice--not Paleo) I had saved in Evernote.  I made it with chicken (added near the end since it was already cooked) instead of shrimp, and more peas since I didn't have spinach.  It turned out pretty good (and leftovers!) but I would leave the celery out, and maybe the peas too, and definitely would add some sirachi next time.  It wasn't as soupy as I expected, so I may have used too much of everything, or maybe I just needed to add more liquid.  It was actually very easy and makes me excited that I can create my own simmer sauces with a little experimentation.

What follows isn't my story, but I'm just amazed at how much more education is needed...

Gluten free headscratch of the day: Went to La Grande Orange for breakfast with a friend. After ordering coffee, I saw the sign in the bakery display saying gluten-free cookies. I asked about them and the girl said they are really good and gluten free. I asked if they were the chocolate chip looking ones. "No, the gluten free cookies are under those." "So, you stack the gluten cookies on top of the gluten-free cookies?" "Sure," she answered, "but only for a little while, so they're fine."  I had already decided not to get any since they were all in the same display case, but that sure sealed the deal. Education is key...

Sunday, April 29, 2012

It's all about food. Well, mostly.

Since my girlfriends weren't going bowling, I decided to stay home and meal plan for my grocery trip.  I sometimes manage a trip to the grocery store during the week after work but it's exhausting and I don't have the energy to cook dinner when I get home, so I usually just do the quick-ish emergency trip when we're out of meat or milk.  I made some waffles for breakfast.  I'm still struggling with my waffle iron to figure out when the waffles are done, how much batter to put on, and how to get the top as beautiful as the bottom.  The first couple were pretty good; I put the third one, which was a little burnt on the bottom, in the fridge for another time (and then Mick ate it for lunch when he got home while I had some leftovers), and threw away the last one which was way too burnt to salvage.  I cleaned up the kitchen and started the dishwasher, knowing what I was expecting throughout the day.

After lunch, I headed out with a cooler and some ice packs in the back of the car.  I filled up with gas at Sam's, then headed in.  There weren't any carts so I knew it would be a quick trip, but I had "saran wrap" on my list.  I couldn't find any, so I did a quick walk through and picked up Simply orange juice and Wholly Guacamole individual packets for me, and pizza rolls and sour cream for him.  I left about 45 minutes after I left my house; the lack of carts definitely works more to my advantage than Sam's.

Next I went to Sprouts, where I found a sale on the vitamin and personal products area.  I've been an Oil of Olay girl for a long time, and have tried a couple other moisturizers, but have wanted to replace my skin care products.  I checked packages for soy and wheat ingredients, and finally got on my phone to check online about the gluten-free status of a couple.  The thing I don't get is that the choices for shampoos and conditioners is endless, but there are almost no hair styling products, and I found exactly two that didn't have soy (the brand had soy in all the rest of their products).  Also, why is there an endless supply of lipgloss but almost no other makeup?  Does being a health nut mean not wearing eyeshadow or mascara?!  I guess it's just something that I have to buy elsewhere, but I don't know where.  I ended up getting several moisturizers and facial cleansers and a toner.

I have tried five or six deodorants in the past couple years.  So far, I'm not impressed with any of them, so I picked up another one to try.  I ended up spending just over $100 in this section, so I got 10% off in addition to the 25% sale.

At this point, I realized that I had spent quite a bit of time reading labels and needed to get moving, so I headed to the food.  This is always an adventure!  I guess one of the hardest parts is reading a label and realizing that I can probably make it myself, and then debating about whether I will make it myself.  There was a panang simmer sauce, and I love panang, but why can't I just make the sauce myself instead of buying the bottle?  But will I make the sauce, that is the question.  For example, I can make marinara sauce, but I know that I won't, and I use it alot for a last minute meal.  I was using it with rice pasta, but found that I kind of like this spicy sausage, garbanzo bean, veggies and sauce mixture instead.  I think that once I make something, I can see how easy or hard it is and make a better decision, but until I have time to make the recipe, I am reluctant to get into making something complicated when I'm already hungry and tired.

Among the things I picked up were the Muir Glen organic tomatoes with chipotle peppers (4/$5, so I got 4 cans) because I love these in whatever quick Mexican meat mixture I'm making with beans to eat with some guacamole.  I got some produce and chicken, mostly organic, to balance out all the not-organic I knew I would get later at Fresh & Easy.

I got a few new things to try including some cranberry juices (can you say vodka?), some pinapple coconut juice (can you say rum?), some coconut milk chocolate yogurt (and some plain that was on sale that I can freeze for smoothies), and some Applegate Farms turkey bacon (mmm, bacon).

Once I was done giving the cashier my arm and my leg, I was ready to go.  I realized as I was leaving that I would have to go to F&E because I forgot Mick's white bread, among other things I could pick up there.

At F&E, I picked up more produce, because you can never have enough potatoes and sweet potatoes and avocados, and I forgot to get garlic earlier...  I have enough "milk" but I did get some of their salsa (Mick loves the pineapple chipotle), and then found tomatillos on the clearance rack--score!  The lady giving out samples saw me looking at the Jenny-O turkey breasts and she highly recommended the sundried tomato one but I wasn't comfortable with the length of the ingredient list, even if it did say "no gluten" on the package, so I got the one that had less ingredients, as well as the g/f corn tortillas they have.  I got a big tray of chicken thighs (more on that later) and some turkey cutlets for a recipe I had seen earlier.

I finally made it home and Mick's parents were already there, as I expected, watching the Coyotes game.  My FIL helped me bring in the groceries and then went to watch the game and I worked on putting everything away.  They brought steaks to grill during the intermission and I had leftover ribs.  We used my microwave potato bag for the sweet potatoes they brought to share, and they really liked how the potatoes turned out.  I did get to watch most of the game after that.

When the game was over, they left, and I cleaned up the kitchen so I could start the next mess.  I had decided to make a Tomatillo Chicken Soup from my favorite cookbook (currently) for my office Soup Throwdown.  So I chopped and cooked and made a huge mess and wore myself out.  Once the soup had been set to simmer for two hours, I took a break with some strawberries and Justin's Chocolate Peanut Butter.  Oh, so yum.  When the soup was "done" I tasted it and it was s.p.i.c.y.  I added some cilantro from my garden (who makes a tomatillo recipe without cilantro?), unsweetened almond milk and hominy with little impact.  I almost instantly regretted adding the hominy since not everyone likes hominy.  I wasn't sure what else to do, so I let it cool a little, put it in the fridge, and asked for help.

Update: My friend K (with English Setters and a garden) suggested corn and honey, so I added 2 cups of frozen sweet corn and some agave syrup (a little easier than my raw honey).  It did help, and I won the Throwdown!

Above all, you’ve got to love yourself enough to give your health priority.  (read online)

Thursday, April 26, 2012

What I'm eating now

I won a giveaway at the beginning of March and *just* remembered that I never got the package.  I'm so sad--I was looking forward to getting all those gluten-free goodies from Jules by way of Gluten-free Frenzy.

Several ladies were in the kitchen today when I ate my late lunch and one of them commented on how well I eat.  She didn't mean it in the "diet" way but in the "that looks and smells great, and it's healthy, too" way.  It was leftovers of the sausage, tomato, pumpkin, garbanzo bean "stew" I made the other night, with a little salad from my garden.  I'm still not starving to death!

One of them told me about how she has changed her habits for better health and she is cutting sugar, although she isn't telling anyone so she doesn't have to deal with the grief.  What an awesome thing she is doing, and how terrible that "we" can't be more supportive of people when they make positive changes in their lives.  She also reminded me that some people live in their own reality, and we should accept that and move on to find our own place of gratitude.  Bless her heart, I think she's right and I appreciated her sharing that she struggles with that too.  I might have some raw cookie recipes for her with no sugar--I should totally try them too.  A guy in the office asked me about my Larabar too, which is essentially nuts and dates, no sugar.

I got artichokes in my produce box this week--it was ordered right before I saw that I have one artichoke in my garden, almost ready.  Okay, maybe it is ready.  It's the same size as the ones I got, but I thought they were supposed to be bigger when they are ready.  So I cooked the 2 that I got by steaming them with some herbs and then finishing with some lemon juice.  I ate one and saved one; the one I ate was pretty good, as good as it can be without a remoulade.

While I was cooking my chicken, I went to the garden to get some lettuce and decided on the Bibb lettuce.  I planted the rosemary I bought over a week ago; I don't expect it to make it but thought I'd try anyway.  When I was digging the hole for it, I ran into a very long red earthworm.  Yay--those are good for the garden, right?  Mick had put one in each of the tree wells when they were planted but he assumed they were all long gone, so I don't know if it was one of those.

When my whole chicken was done boiling (with some celery tops, onions, and herbs), I cut a couple large breast pieces off and chopped them up.  I added that to a pot of pinto beans and a container of salsa.  I served mine over a sweet potato.  Pretty good stuff.  I have some leftover and another sweet potato, and some additional leftovers for my leftover mashed potatoes.  I think this would have been very good over rice, too, but didn't think about it in time.

I finished with some Cherry Amaretto coconut milk ice cream.  I really need to learn to make some myself.  Or stop eating it.  Yeah, I need to make it myself.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

The Sun Also Rises

Our book club decided to alternate fiction and non-fiction, so the first fiction selection was "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway.  I have a softcover set of Hemingway books from the Book of the Month Club, in addition to a hardcover edition of his short stories.  A book club member, N, also provided both a pdf version and a Sparknotes link for reference.

I vaguely recall reading this ages ago, probably around the time I went to Spain almost twenty years ago.  I remember being a little disappointed that it wasn't really about the running of the bulls or Spain; that was just kind of a backdrop for part of the book.
The book was written during another time, when it was okay to refer to people as nigger; even knowing that, it was still a bit of a shock the first time I ran across it while re-reading the book for the club meeting.

For the two others who had read the book, N had read it multiple times and referred to it as a book that had some influence on his life, and J had just read it for the first time and thoroughly hated it.  I am somewhere in between.  In addition, two others joined us for the book club meeting although they had not read the book.

There is a story, and it is pretty well written, but it's a story about characters that are hard to like.  Our consensus was that they were all a bunch of miserable drunks with no life purpose.  J said he has a mission statement and areas of focus, and we discussed George Kinder's version (five themes summarized here) which are quite or at least somewhat different for each of us.  For example, health is not really on there, but it's a major area of focus for me.

Is the purpose of life to be happy?  Does it matter if someone is a do-er or be-er.  That's not beer; let's try it this way.  Does is matter if someone is doing or being?  When someone suggested that we should help others in finding their purpose, there were some flags on the play.  I find it difficult to agree that I should tell someone that they will be happier if they find their purpose--sometimes, people just don't want to be happy (but they wouldn't say that) or they don't want to do what they need to do to be happy.  I think it's like trying to get someone to lose weight--they have to make their own choices.  Some thought that could invite judging.  I was really surprised that one person felt that she does not judge.  I think most of us can agree that we all make judgments, but maybe her definition just differed from ours too much.

I did not find this book very interesting or engaging.  Nothing much happened in the whole book.  The characters went to Paris and then to Pamplona, but Hemingway seemed to be “name dropping” famous bars and eateries along the way.  Mostly they were just drunk and not happy.  Part of my dissatisfaction with the book was the way the characters did not seem to have any purpose to their existence.  (J's summary, in part)

Several of us have read other Hemingway books.  As was suggested in our group, do you think that "classic" writers get a little bit of a pass on some of their works because their other works were so great?

Next month's book is Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar.

My awesome body. Yeah, not like that.

Last year, the endocrinologist started throwing around terms like Graves disease, but said I didn't have it yet.  More recently, about 2 visits ago, she changed her mind and suggested I get a "baseline" exam at the special eye doctor.  Last visit, she asked if I scheduled it yet, and I had not, so I did right away.

Today, I went to the special eye doctor. I waited for about half an hour and then the assistant asked some questions. Since I recently changed thryoid medications, I couldn't remember the name, just how it starts, so she filled it in.

The doctor came in and corrected her mistake to the thyroid drug instead of an immunosuppresent drug. He confused me a little by talking about catching it early but then saying it runs it's course over a couple years. For 90% (and he implied women rather than general Graves population--is it only in women?), the effects will not be long-term; it goes into remission. So I have remitting relapsing MS and remitting Graves?  For the other 10%, he has to do surgery to correct their eye issues.

Yep, that's right, I'm in another lottery. He could tell by looking at my eyes that I have Graves, and you can too, if you know what to look for. I have lid retraction but no protrusion. It's so subtle that I think most people probably don't even notice, but it could get worse. If it goes from being an inflammatory issue to being more permanent, then surgery is required. He felt that I am most likely in the 90% who don't need surgery.

During his exam, he was looking for pain or discomfort when I move my eye to the extreme directions and I did have a little when looking up. He said that some twitchiness I had around the eyes was from the insomnia, which I had when I was improperly medicated for my thyroid. He suggested that I would have to use drops to keep my eyes properly lubricated while I have active Graves.

I did tear up a little during our discussion. I mean, really? What the hell else can be wrong with me?  WTF!? My eyes used to be one of my favorite features (I was an awkward kid so there wasn't much to choose). My mom has crossed eyes and, as much as I look like her (it's a little scary for me really), I always thought, at least I have my eyes. I'm obviously being punished for being a terrible wicked person. Even if no one else notices, I will notice now, all the time, that my eye is wonky.

After my torturously long visit, I went to get lunch. I had planned to eat out so that I wouldn't have to talk to coworkers after a doctor visit AND trying to get over my bad attitude, so I had looked up a couple places. In retrospect, even though it was in the wrong direction and a little more pricy, I probably should have gone to Nourish123 since I know that I can eat safely there. Instead, I went to a Vietnamese Noodle place.

I asked the helpful lady about dishes without wheat/gluten or soy. The curries have soy, the pho do not. She pointed out a vegetable stir fry dish with rice that would be fine, so I had that with chicken, and a glass of green ice tea. I also had some spring rolls and she brought me a chili sauce instead of the other peanut sauce that usually comes. Everything was very good, but could have used more spice--it didn't really have any spice at all--and I had some to take with me.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Just let it go.

I was upset all day about my bad attitude yesterday.  I know that I can't control other people, I can only control my reaction to other people.  And I try to mentally prepare and practice positive reactions when I am not feeling it.  But what I know doesn't always translate to what I do or what I say.

For my regular readers (all 3 of you), maybe this starts to explain the issue going on in my head emotions:

Serving is different from helping. Helping is not a relationship between equals. A helper may see others as weaker than they are, needier than they are, and people often feel this inequality. The danger in helping is that we may inadvertently take away from people more than we could ever give them; we may diminish their self-esteem, their sense of worth, integrity or even wholeness.


Serving requires us to know that our humanity is more powerful than our expertise. In forty-five years of chronic illness I have been helped by a great number of people, and fixed by a great many others who did not recognize my wholeness. All that fixing and helping left me wounded in some important and fundamental ways. Only service heals.

I don't know how to "fix" my bad attitude but I hope as I understand where others are coming from, I can accept that they just can't help me as I would like to be helped.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Bad attitude

I haven't felt well for a couple days, but seem to be feeling better today.  I was super tired since we stayed up late smoking ribs.  Mick wasn't done with them until around 5, but I went to bed earlier.  Based on our conversation and his awesomeness, he had been careful about cross-contamination, starting with the rubs and sauces and the placement of the ribs in the smoking rack.  He labeled each rack of ribs when they were done so that I would know if I could have them or not.  All of the ribs got a rub, either spicy or not, which were all safe for me.  Two stayed dry and four had sauce: one Masterpiece (not safe; also not good in my opinion--let's blame that on my Texas blood), one with a sauce that he picked up at the BBQ Fest recently (not safe), one that I picked up (safe), and one that I made.

After our limited sleep, we went bowling and I took my right handed ball, the yellow ball that I love but stopped using because my right shoulder has been giving me trouble.  I couldn't bowl left-handed since my left thumb is still bandaged from the other day when I tried to slice it with a mandolin.  I did okay, but had trouble figuring out where my starting point and mark were.

The girls decided to leave a little early for a Total Wine run; they wanted to try to make this blueberry lemon drop-ish drink that A had recently.  We got a few things and headed to the house.

We checked out the garden and picked out some lettuce, radishes, tomatoes, celery, cilantro and parsley for the salad and guacamole, and mint for the tea.  Some of my tomatoes are finally getting normal sized and I have an artichoke developing on my humongous artichoke plant.  I have started watering the second garden now when I can, so maybe it will fill in.

While we were prepping in the kitchen, Mick, a couple of his relatives, and his friends arrived.

Mick started putting the ribs on cookies sheets to go in the oven.  His friend wrote down which ribs were which.  I thought that was really cool, so I said "thanks for keeping me safe."  Someone said something softly about "can you eat them since they will be in the same oven?"  I didn't say anything to him, but I really think I should have.  The problem is that I wouldn't have said what I should have said.  So instead, I whispered to my friend that I could NOT believe that he said that.  And I held the rest inside.

We were chopping veggies and making drinks and all that kitchen stuff, and then we ate, all of us around the table.

Mick packaged the leftover ribs, some for us and some for the helpers who had purchased half of them for us to smoke.

I watched "Say Anything" with my friends and Mick watched some WWE movie that was apparently really, really bad with everyone else.  I haven't seen "Say Anything" in a long time and I guess even then it was probably just parts.  It has some good parts; it's not a great movie but I love it.  (Later, after everyone left, Mick and I watched Hot Tub Time Machine and it was not great but better than expected.)

It was pretty hot, so I was surprised at how much time relative spent with the garden, but grateful that he did it, as I wouldn't be able to and I don't know that Mick would.

At the end of the day, Mick said that he was really disappointed with my bad attitude.  Yeah, we got to it.  In addition, he was upset that I had said something to my friends that he didn't think was appropriate, repeated something that we had talked about.  He couldn't remember what but I'm pretty sure I know what after thinking about it a little.  He made a hypothetical suggestion that really floored me and I definitely repeated it.  I'm always a little surprised when he doesn't want me to repeat something to friends when he repeats everything to his friends unless I specifically say, don't repeat this.  And my very late recognition of this issue has caused some issues between me and them over time that are likely not fixable.  And now I have a bad attitude.

I have a bad attitude because I don't want to get sick from eating something made in my own house.  (Like it's not bad enough that I get sick so much when I eat elsewhere.)  I have a bad attitude for lots of reasons.

Is admitting it the first step?  Yes, I have a bad attitude.  I'm upset, emotional, angry, and I don't know how to get out of this place.  This is not who I want to be.  This is not how I want to be.  I would never want someone to think that I am that person, the person with a bad attitude.  But I am.  I am that person.  I am that person with the bad attitude.

Friday, April 20, 2012

Trial update

I completed my survey.

When I got my email reminder this week, I mentioned to Mick that I had missed two monthly monitoring appointments since the new guy took over as my care coordinator.  M started freaking out about how they are supposed to be monitoring me and I need to call the doctor to let him know.  I told him that I already left a message at the research center but was planning to call again, then call the doctor's office.

So yesterday, I called the research center, got transferred to a lady who scheduled me to come in as soon as possible.  And today , I went in to have my "monthly" monitoring.  I weighed just over 142.  Everything went as it always does except she took my blood instead of taking me to Sonora.

Monday, April 16, 2012

I'm *that* bitch. The bitch that brings wine.

I took four extra large boxes of clothes, sizes 14, 16, and XL, to Poor Little Rich Girl, a consignment shop near my office.  The very lovely lady told me that they take mostly designer labels, and seasonal clothing, so she wasn't able to take very much from me.  She found 9 items that she thought could work there, including my Lucky jeans, an Anne Taylor skirt (out of season but so awesome she took it anyway), 3 Banana Republic skirts, and a few other things.  She suggested I try Smarty Pants to take some more pieces, although they also take clothes seasonally and a lot of my professional clothes are more "wintery".  Unfortunately, they don't take consignment on Mondays, so I'll have to try another day.

Since that created a 2 hour lunch, I stayed at work late trying to get my must-do list done (FAIL) before heading to the grocery store.  I left at 7 and stopped at Sprouts for a "quick" shopping trip.  I got a little distracted with face moisturizers--I want to find a new one, and I'm starting to look for wheat and soy products. Yes, I'm becoming paranoid (video), what of it?  I got a bag of apples, a whole chicken, chicken breasts, and 2 packages of hot chicken sausage before heading to the wine sale, where I bought nine bottles.  Because they make nice gifts.  For me.  Okay, for others, too.  Because no one ever says, that bitch always brings me wine, but almost everyone will say, that bitch never brings me wine.  So I'm bringing wine.

Eating well
I started a bottle of white wine chilling while I made dinner.  I started a pot of water for some rice pasta while I cooked a package of spicy chicken sausage.  I usually add some veggies at this point, but I had roasted veggies from last night, so I just added the marinara after the sausage was cooked, then the veggies, then the almost cooked pasta.  Perfecto!  Mmmm, wine.  Mick made his first steak on the green egg and it. was. awesome.  I'm not even a steak eater, but the bite he gave me was like butta.

After watching hockey highlights--my favorite way to watch hockey, although I love to watch a Coyotes game--I decided to catch up with some online friends.

I felt a little dissed by a lot of this broadcast (audio, initially very loud) about celebrities going gluten-free, especially early on.  Yeah, that's right, I'm not diagnosed with Celiac disease.  That doesn't make my food issues less of a medical issue, IMO, but maybe it does.  As Jules points out, *why* would someone who has cut gluten and feels better want to eat gluten for a Celiac test?  Why?  Because the doctors, who don't have a fucking clue what we're going through, think it's either Celiac or it's in your head.  Wait.  I thought that MS was in my head--can everything be in my head?!  Oooh, maybe--I am a stupid girl (video).

As the broadcast progresses, I felt that the conversation was more balanced and focused more on the bigger issues of eating real food and the issues of feeling left out of the normalcy of eating food.  Until you have to watch what you're eating for the sake of how you feel, you don't realize how much of our lives are spent in settings where everyone is eating and sharing food.

I guess I'm "fortunate" that I can't eat most gluten-free products, so I really do eat and feel better.  So many people run out and buy all the g/f products they can find, and of course, are disappointed with so many of them, feeling they wasted their money.  But I've had to be so much more strict and selective, so I haven't wasted nearly as much money and resources, but I feel like I waste so much more time figuring things out.

I am so fortunate also that I have people, old friends and new, who are looking out for me, looking for solutions and passing on ideas.  Just today, my neighbor, M, passed me a link to a soy substitute (coconut aminos) which I actually have recently purchased; I thought that was so awesome that she saw that and thought of me.  Then, my friend's friend (my new friend) posted on FB a photo of chocolate dipped g/f macaroons she made.  As soon as I saw eggs, I thought, of course, but when I said that, IMO, giving up eggs is harder than wheat, she found a recipe for egg-free, g/f macaroons.  Sweet!  I'm totally going to make these.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

The protective glove only works when you wear it.

This morning, we went bowling with our bowling friends, except the sick one.  My legs (front, above the knees) are killing me from yesterday's workout.  I wasn't feeling well last night, at all, but was feeling better-ish this morning.  I was able to empty out after a couple games, and felt better but then my thumb started doing something weird and new--it's like a sharp pain, almost a throb, totally random.  It was one of the worst bowling days I've had in quite a while.

We went to Royal Jasmine for some Thai food and I tried the red curry chicken, medium spice.  It was scrumptious and spicier than I expected.  I stuffed myself and took the extra rice and sauce home.

We went home and Mick showed me the compost--we're switching to the second bin again--and the farm plot. I was so tired, so I went to watch TV and took a nap for a couple hours.  I was concerned that it was getting late and I wanted to do some gardening, so I headed out.  It was getting dark before I was really done.  I felt kind of shaky and exhausted and headed in to get my veggies ready for roasting.

I couldn't believe how late it was already and how much work I had left to do before I could roast the veggies.  On top of that, I didn't really have anything else to make for dinner, so I knew that he would want something I wasn't making.

Then he told me to shut the window in the dog room; he had opened it because it "still smelled like shit."  I thought maybe I had missed something when I cleaned up, so I started moving the kennel out and realized there was more poop in the kennel.  She had another accident after I had cleaned up the previous accident.  I felt terrible that she had been in her kennel with poop.  I put her bedding in the wash and cleaned up to get the vegetables in the oven before finishing the kennel cleanup.

I thought I could use the mandolin for some of the slicing but started with a hard carrot and sliced my thumb pretty badly.  *shit*  I actually thought, as I was starting to move the carrot, that I should put my protective glove on.  But I didn't.  And then I was bleeding.  And he had to stop playing long enough to bandage me.

After I was well bandaged, I resumed my cooking and cleaning duties.  I don't think he liked the outcome, but I loved the roasted veggies, especially the broccoli and the garlic.

Garden Update

One ripe strawberry
Swiss chard, turnips, beets (front box)
carrots, radishes, lettuce (front box)
finally a medium sized red tomato, more to come
spinach (it's tiny)
Bibb lettuce

red Romaine with tiny carrot sprouts
Palo Verde tree in bloom
the farm

carrots, turnips, beets, radishes, green onions, tomatoes, lettuce, lonely strawberry

Friday, April 13, 2012

Giddy Garbage

I picked up our girls night out concert tickets for one of my very favorite bands today.  I'm a little giddy.
Lucky Man? No! Lucky Woman!
I was wearing this, what I wore to work, first time wearing it.  The dress and jacket (both jersey) are from my old thin wardrobe, the boots were purchased right before the slide down the scale, and the tights were on clearance.  I can't wait until "summer" dress code so I can wear it with lighter shoes and no tights.  It's super comfortable, but I'm not sure it's super stylish.

Did I mention that I'm completely giddy about the tickets?  And that's all.

Sunday, April 8, 2012


We hosted Easter.

I was not feeling well on Easter Eve, so I was up early to prepare food and get ready before Mick's family got there. My MIL brought eggs and candy for the kids to find as well as coloring games and stickers. They all had fun.

After everyone left, I cleaned up the kitchen and retired, exhausted from a day of cooking, cleaning, gardening, playing games, and dealing with my emotions.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Agility class

We had a course tonight and both Cassi and Teka had fun running it with me.  It started with a jump around to a second jump to a tire with a sharp left turn to a teeter--I rear crossed between the tire and the teeter.  Cassi's teeter was pretty slow but I went all the way to the end and waited for her and she made it.  Next, we took a sharp left over a panel jump and "out" to the right to the tunnel under the dog walk.  I didn't even have to say tunnel for either of them, just "out" and they took it.  Coming out of the tunnel right next to the end of the dog walk, they ran the dog walk.  My instructor, J, later told me that I could wait at the first end of the tunnel instead of babysitting the end of the dog walk--they will do it.

After the dog walk, I sent them to the left end of the tunnel, coming out nearly lined up for the weaves.  They both missed and had to redo one try--Cassi looked like she hit her foot on the bottom bar of the weaves, and Teka just skipped one, maybe because of a similar issue as it was around the same place.  They both did the weaves well after that.  Then we took a right turn to the table.  Coming off the table, they took a jump, then I sent them out to the next jump (the starting jump) and around over the second jump.  Teka missed that out jump the first time but only because she was distracted by her leash on the ground.

Next was the A-frame and I tried a front cross once and a rear cross once.  From the A-frame was a sharp left to a double jump, sharp left to a chute.  I wasn't sure how to handle it, but I gave them the room to do it, and they stayed out long enough to come over the next jump.  Then I sent out for the next jump, then the triple, then "here" over the last jump.

J thinks Teka (and Cassi) can do well at the trial but she's concerned about the heat.  Well, me too!