Saddle Mountain Brewery

Last night, we went to our neighbor's grand opening. As I understand it, this is the first brewery to open in Goodyear. The service was terrible but it looks promising and hopefully they will work it all out. Mick invited our friend M, which surprised me since he doesn't drink (and some other reasons outside the scope of this blog), but it is a restaurant too. My SIL called and said Dr. Q told her to go out with me this weekend so I invited her too since Mick had already invited M. YES, my doctor told my SIL, who I sent to him, to go out with me.

I had sweet tea and a bunless burger with a "bare" side salad. My dinner came much later than everyone else's (pretty sure they messed it up and had to remake it) so I forgot to take a photo. The salad actually came first but since it had no dressing, I thought I'd wait. It was spring mix and spinach with cranberries and tomatoes. I finally decided I couldn't wait and ate most of by the time my burger arrived. The salad and burger were good. I think Mick and M really liked their pizzas and my SIL liked her sandwich. M and my SIL got a flight of beers and found one they both liked.

Even with the service hiccups, we had fun. They came back to our house to hang out a little before heading home.

Yep!

Today, I got my hair color done--wash those grays away! I mentioned to a couple people, including Mick, that I was thinking of going a little redder. Since I have some red undertones anyway, my hairdresser said she wanted to mix my old brown color in with the redder color this time, see how it takes, and then go all with the new color next time. It turned out fantastic.

When I came home, he told me he doesn't like the color. WTH. Can a wife get a muther-effin compliment in here? (The answer to that is NO, in case you don't know.)

Update: I have a photo on tomorrow's post if you want to see the color. No compliments necessary. I got them from M (who knew I was having it done) and my coworker/friend J (who did not know I was getting it done.)

Update 2: I sent Mick the free head shot I got at my recent conference and he replied with a comment about "hottie" so apparently I CAN get a muther-effin compliment! A little more often would be nice but I guess that's what I have friends for.

Logic vs logic

I don't know if it's a gender thing or an engineer/non-engineer thing but some days...being married is at best, amusing and at worst, frustrating.

 

Before telling this story, I want to remind you that I'm married to a great guy who is my friend and is there for me when it counts. (Exhibit A: blog post last week describing the tea incident. He took care of everything while trying to keep me from becoming really upset about the whole situation.)

 

A few weeks ago, I was no longer able to print from my laptop. He suggested I was still connected to the VPN (work network) but I knew I wasn't. I didn't argue.

 

About a week later, I complained again that I couldn't print. He ignored it.

 

Again, I complained. Again I was ignored.

 

Then we needed to return a pan to Amazon that I had ordered for him. It was supposed to be a fryer pan but when he and his dad used it on the (thankfully not in my kitchen) outdoor burner, it leaked oil out of the bottom. FOR REAL! It's unbelievable; I've never heard of such a thing but he said there were some reviews that had said that, although most did not.

 

So I needed went to Amazon to get the return label. They allow the return label to be sent to another email address so I sent it to Mick to print. THEN he wanted to know why I couldn't print it and FINALLY looked at my laptop.

 

He tries to claim that I have problems because I keep too many tabs open. Unfortunately, most of the tabs I had open at that time were things I was waiting to print out!

 

After about an hour, he was finally able to fix my computer and I can print.

 

And he says, you should really take care of things as soon as you know there is a problem instead of letting it get this bad.

 

O_O

 

Like I have been sitting on this problem and never told him! Gah! WTH.

 

But now I can print. And I have permission/directives from him to text him the things I need done by him. Yes, I text my husband when I need things done. What has this world come to... (I'm old. Get off my lawn.)

Southern Rail

My friend B and I go to dinner every few weeks or so and one of the places we really like and almost always have good luck for me is Beckett's Table. The owners have opened a new restaurant so we decided to go check it out. It's in an area off the light rail that is being "revitalized," with a new location of Changing Hands bookstore and a bar recently opened and a Southwest Gardener shop soon to open.

Southern Rail has a similar menu vibe to Beckett's--local, fresh, organic--but a dissimilar menu. This new menu is southern inspired. I wouldn't say southern, which seems to be a sticking point for a lot of online reviewers who criticized the authenticity, but definitely influenced.

B has tomato and melon allergies so I let her ask her questions first. She ended up getting cornbread muffins to start; the butter is the star. For dinner she had the cider brined pork loin and took half the pork home for later. The sides stole the show for her. She loved the sweet potatoes and said she would come back just for that!

Although her meal happened to be gluten-free, it wasn't something I could eat. I gave the waiter my allergy card and a few items that sounded promising; he consulted with the chef. I started with the watermelon salad. It was very good but, as most of the menu, it seemed like a lot of money for what I got.

For my entrée, I had the duck with dirty rice and collards. The chef made some minor adjustments in the finishing touches it sounds like but nothing that I could tell would make it any different. It was amazeballs.

We didn't have dessert since there were no options for me. I had sweet tea to drink so I already had my sugar anyway. Yes, the sweet tea was totally yummy. I love sweet tea but I don't make it at home because, well, it's sweet tea--it should be a treat I think.

Based on the prices here, I think this won't be an all-the-time place but it's definitely worth it. And it's open on Monday nights, when Beckett's is closed.

As we were leaving, a couple of older guys were walking up from their truck and their dog was barking. B and I stood there a moment trying to decide if it was possible they were getting dinner to-go. At 8 o'clock at night, it's still 100 degrees out so it's unsafe and totally illegal to leave your dog in the car. I went back in and told the manager who came out to confirm and take care of it. I left without waiting but I hope he really did.

Here's what pisses me off about it--those effin guys live in Arizona (AZ plates) so they should effin know better. They are going into a very nice restaurant to have dinner while their dog is in a hot, unventilated vehicle. Do they live under a rock (uninformed) or do they think SCIENCE doesn't apply to them and their dog? Have you ever shut your car off and just sat there in the 100 degree weather? Even after dark, with the windows cracked, you are going to be uncomfortable very quickly.

Review me

My supervisor gave me some very positive feedback about how essential I am. It's such a great thing to hear after feeling so overwhelmed for so long. I'm still overwhelmed, but at least I know that my accomplishments and contributions for the team are appreciated.

Update: she also wrote her positive feedback for my file. And then someone higher up had to rain on my parade by bringing up my negotiated hours are less than the normal requirement. Even though I was over my negotiated number of hours this past year. WTF. No respect.

Update again: Someone else high up gave me some (almost giddy) positive feedback about a solution I implemented after identifying one of those annoying issues that most people ignore but I was finally too annoyed and came up with a plan, got it approved, implemented it, revised it and documented it. Cause that's I roll, y'all. Getting things done, biatches.

Tree sabotage

Um, the tree tried to keep me from leaving work today. Mick is out of town on his Alaskan fishing trip so I left work a little earlier than I would have. My boss had left about ten minutes earlier. But I didn't get to leave because this...

Can't leave!

So I let the guys who were still there know. One was heading to a game so he had friends pick him up. The other lives about as far away as I do but in the opposite direction. I started calling tree removal services but there aren't many that will come out at 5:30 on a Friday. I found one on the fifth call.

In the meantime, the other guy was calling the boss, who wanted to know if we had people to pick us up. The issues (off the top of my head) with this short-sighted (but common suggestion apparently) is that I would not have my car for the weekend, I would have to have someone drive me all the way home to let out the dogs so I couldn't just go stay with someone nearby, and I would have no way to get to work on Monday. Someone asked me if I could just go to a bar nearby. One, the closest business is a half mile away so the nearest bar is probably about 3/4 mile away. And it is HOT out there. Second, what kind of plan is that? I can't stay at the bar until Monday. I have no one to let the dogs out. The bar will close and kick me out. Great sentiment but terrible plan.

So we waited and they came and took the tree and the boss came and paid for it and I went home and let my poor pups out.

Thanks guys!

It was late. I was hungry. I made this quickie dinner. It wasn't great but the chicken salad and the Kettle Crinkle Chips I ate with it were good. I wouldn't buy the pupusas again though. And I have some left that I kind of need to eat. Sigh.

What I ate

What I wore

Must have been a rough weekend

I have been to the toilet three times already today. No wonder I felt so meh yesterday. I'm trying to think of what I ate. Was it the point of gluten free cookies and cream ice cream? The beef tacos? The blueberry coconut milk yogurt? The Friday night beverage of pineapple coconut juice with 1800 coconut tequila? The waffles, nectarines and sausage? The orange juice?

Could it be, as my naturopathic doctors suggest, stress related? Now that I've decided not to blog about people, it may seem that I have no stress, but in reality, I still hate people. I hate the stupid things they do, the way they don't own up to it, the excuses, trying to cover it up.

I hate that I am supposedly intimidating. That being intimidated by me is not viewed as a ploy, a deception, a manipulation.

I hate this game. The what is wrong with me game. It's tiring. Unending. Ridiculous.

Maybe it's time to detox. That might work on the food issues but not as likely on the people issues.

If only.

I've made comments to my hubby about the time he will be gone and I'll be home alone for 5 days. Yeah, I probably shouldn't let him in on how much I'm looking forward to my alone time. And it's not that I don't want him around obviously! It's complicated and probably beyond explanation here. The best I can do is say I have more control and less uncertainty. (In case you don't know me IRL, I should clarify this is not really related to my DH but some peripheral consequences of our life. Cryptic much?!)

I may have to stop Facebooking

People are driving me crazy on The Facebook.

I am so tired of all the CRAP people post. Just tell me what is going on with you. Maybe share a nice photo or tell me something funny. Not what makes a cute relationship, not how to win anything, not a photo of Bill Gates promising you money, not your daily horoscope. Facebook is not your recipe binder. Oh that recipe looks good to you? Then get up off your ass and make the recipe instead of posting that on Facebook.

This is coming from someone who had been told I post too many food photos. Not that I do, but that's what I've been told. Now I have Instagram for that!

I should not have posted my opinion. In the public. (Just my public, not really the whole public.) The public is not nice.

A couple of days ago, a (I had to think about the label to use here...) person we used to know but the family moved away (good? Not a friend really. But not a not friend. Or whatever.) ...posts an article bashing Phoenix. I started reading it thinking it was going to be funny, a joke. But it was just negative. And worse, a lot of it was wrong at least in my opinion.

Today, a friend posts about her gluten free baking failures. All is fun and games in the comments as they usually are with her group of friends. And then...

Some recipes just should not be changed. Gluten free-ers eat something else!

Grr.

Wait what was the question

This week, Jimmy Fallon had a segment on The Tonight Show called Wait What Was The Question?

I had one of those today.

At happy hour, a friend I haven't seen in a few months came to join us so I was sitting between two friends and across the table was a woman I have met but don't know at all. I was telling my friends about my terrible experience at Jewel's recently. Happy hour was at Majerle's so I sneaked in food from Five Guys. The lady started questioning the whole concept that I cannot eat at Majerle's and that I couldn't eat the salad that had edamame on it since I could "just" pick it off.

I often get questioned by "innocent bystanders" about my dietary choices so I would like to think I'm used to it and can handle it. However, it felt like this lady was interrogating me. It was kind of all the conversations I run into rolled into one.

After some back and forth, she said I could have "a little" as part of her idea that I can take edamame or croutons off a salad. Of course I can't have "a little." As much as I don't want to talk about body functions while sitting at a table where people are eating and drinking, I explained that eating something on my list would give me diarrhea for four days. Most often, the D word will be the end of the conversation because really, who wishes a week of diarrhea on anyone?

But no. Diarrhea is not a deterrent for this lady.

I've read entire rants on Celiac websites and gluten free blogs about this "a little" idea, where they often compare gluten (for someone who can't have it, obviously--not for everyone) and rat poison. So I asked her if she could eat a little rat poison.

I actually thought before I said it...I thought, this is ridiculous and I should NOT say it. But she was pushing so much that I said it.

And she said YES.

Yes, I can ingest a little rat poison.

What.

The.

Fuck.

Are you kidding me? Did you not read that book by VC Andrews where the kids are killed with rat poison on the sugar cookies? You would willingly eat rat poison? On a regular basis?

Of course I didn't say that. I could FEEL my friend--I wasn't sure if she was willing me to shut up or she was trying not to say something.

Neither. She was trying not to laugh.

Because my question, as ridiculous as it was, no longer seemed ridiculous. A grown ass woman sat across the table from me and essentially told me that I should poison myself. Why? Because it's more convenient for someone who doesn't understand--that it is better for her that I eat without making a scene or asking for accommodations than for me to be healthy and well? Why are people's attempts to improve their health through diet so controversial and open to ridicule while it's perfectly acceptable to make yourself sick with medications?

So...

What was the question?

Can I have "a little" wheat, soy, dairy, eggs, bananas, yeast, amaranth? Just a little? NO.

I do not understand the benefit to me at all. Because there isn't one.

What is the benefit of eating rat poison just because you can (apparently)? I'm not trying to be dramatic, and I realize I don't have anaphylactic reactions so maybe people don't take me as seriously, but I cried in pain for years while I poisoned myself without realizing what was happening. I don't see that I would make a choice to revert to that crying, sniveling, helpless state ever again. For years, I missed the quality of life that people like her take for granted, that I can never get back.

I KNOW--I'M SO SELFISH.

truthiness

Wait, what was the question?

Would it be appropriate for me to give her some rat poison at a future happy hour? I mean, she did say she can eat it...

This week is stalking me into next week.

I thought I could break up with This Week and be done with it.

But then I got a call confirming my doctor appointment on Tuesday. With the doctor I wasn't able to see this past Tuesday because she isn't there on Tuesdays.

W. T. F. Are you kidding me? I must be mishearing this message.

I called back to find out if I misunderstood since my appointment is scheduled on Thursday and I was told that whoever told me that was wrong. I'm pretty sure I was talking to the same person but who knows.

Anyway. I now how an appointment in Tempe on Tuesday followed by an appointment for a blood draw in Scottsdale. Then I have another doctor appointment on Thursday in Tempe. AND I'm supposed to schedule an appointment with my primary doctor. How am I supposed to get any work done?

So I stayed later at the office than I wanted or meant to but we have had some technical problems with our time tracking system and I knew that I would probably lose all my entries thus far if I didn't actually finish and release my time. But since I already lost a bunch of entries (that I shouldn't have lost but it's being all wonky), I had to recreate what I have done for three weeks. I'm so frustrated with this ridiculousness.

(To be fair, there are some women in government too. But we all know the men did this.)

I went to the neighborhood Bunco, just taking some leftovers for my dinner since I was running so late. And Mick made me a large tasty beverage. When I got there, everyone was still eating and chatting and hadn't started playing so I felt better about being so late.

Then the host, who eats somewhat restricted due to her husband's food sensitivities told me she had made a gluten-free carrot cake and would go through the ingredients with me. I know she doesn't do dairy so I thought we might be okay but I was doubtful. The frosting checked out! And then there were four eggs in the cake. Oh well.

What appointment?

The more I do, the farther behind I get. That doesn't sound right. Let me try again.

As I check things off my list, I get to add several more items. Huh. That didn't sound better.

When I think I'm almost done with something, it gets rescheduled. Well, now, this just isn't working at all.

Last night, Cassi had discharge coming from her hoo-haa. Like dripping, trailing, snotty looking grossness. Poor baby. I added vet to my list. That would be schedule vet, go to vet. Then Mick said he thought that wasn't necessary. Hmm. Okay. I'll leave it on my later list.

I had a big Paleo breakfast of meatballs, sweet potato, apple, almond butter and pumpkin pie coconut butter. So I wasn't all that hungry for lunch. I had a doctor appointment at 1 so I thought I'd eat after.

I did not have a doctor appointment. Well, I did, but I didn't. When I go to the naturopathic college, I pay, then schedule the next appointment if needed. I write it on the receipt and read it back to confirm. When I get to my office, I put the appointment on both my calendars before putting the receipt in my current medical file. This is my ritual since I am not the best at remembering things.

Apparently, Dr. H only works on Thursdays so they wouldn't have scheduled me for a Tuesday appointment. Let's just note here that my last appointment (less than two months ago) was on a Wednesday.

O_O

Yeah, I am rescheduled. I'm guessing they cleared her schedule without checking all the appointments.

So now I'm pissed, I've wasted my time, I'm not really hungry but I know I have to eat since I have class tonight and won't really eat dinner first. I'm near ASU and think there is a Bombay Spice around there. Well, I find it but it's on campus so there is only metered parking. Never freaking mind. But around the corner, I see Thai Basil. I'll try that.

The waitress confirms that the curries are all wheat-free, soy-free, and dairy-free.

red curry with chicken

I like it.

This post is bullshit.

This post is whiny. And there is a LOT of cursing. Feel free to skip it.

Monday

O. M. F. G.

F. F. F. F.

I love my job. I love my job. I love my job.

So we have this five hour annual meeting, mandatory attendance for all employees in all of our offices. Of course, since we have multiple offices, I thought "I can work at home and video conference the meeting." That totally makes sense given that we will be having a videoconference meeting.

Or maybe it doesn't and my idea of what makes sense is totally off base.

There was a menu sent around for the lunch order. For Paradise Bakery. What the goddamn fuck. Like I could possibly eat anything from there.* I replied that I was planning to work at home. I got a response back that it would have to be okay with the person copied on the mail. Since he didn't say no, I thought it was a yes. Oh, my word, I am such a fucking idiot.

So the menu went out again today for those of us who haven't ordered. And I say that I'm working at home. And I can't eat anything from there. But thanks. And then I get the "you can't work at home unless it's approved." And the "approver" emails "people can work from home another day, they should be in the office for this meeting." [Yes, I know there should be a semi-colon but that is how he wrote it.]

While I am sending a response that I misunderstood and I'll bring my own lunch, I get ANOTHER. FUCKING. EMAIL requesting my order. From the same person. The one I have already told at LEAST twice that I can't eat that crap. Are you fucking with me? Holy hell, what is wrong with you? If you were in this office right now, I would probably have to leave to keep from smacking the crap outta you and calling you names.

This bullshit is bullshit. Every damn day is hard enough for me without this bullshit. Fuck you all. No, really. FUCK YOU.

Then she says that "If there is a place you can grab takeout, please do so and give the receipt to [office manager] for reimbursement. Every employee should have a meal regardless of their dietary restrictions. :)"

YES SHE DID. Yes, she did say that bullshit. And! Yes, she did put a fucking smile face emoticon. Every employee should have a meal regardless of their dietary restrictions? REALLY?!

Really. Where has this policy been for the last year? Or two.

*Our Friday "lunchtime learning" where they order lunch every other week and I have been able to eat ONCE gets on my last goddamn nerve. Last week, when I was going to be out of town, they ordered from the ONE. PLACE. THEY. ORDER. FROM. THAT HAS FOOD I CAN EAT. What the fucking hell, people? I even asked if they could get something else and order that next time and they just smiled at me like I'm some little kid they don't want to upset so they won't say no but they aren't going to give me what I want either. I fucking hate people. All of you. Hate you all. Fuck off.

 

So I asked if I would have time to leave and come back without missing anything. And under my breath in my inside voice I said since it is so fucking important for us to be together as a group in only three locations and not four.

Yep, there is a whole half hour that people will be eating lunch while I can go GET MY LUNCH. AND COME BACK. But "people will continue eating" when the presentation starts back up. Yeah, as long as the trough has food in it, people will keep mindlessly eating. (Sorry, feeling a little judgmental right now.)

I know it's not her fault that I'm a freak pain in the ass freaky McFreakster, but still, this whole thing is fucking bullshit. I'm tired of feeling singled out or left out. Why does everything have to center around food all the damn time anyway?

Maybe I'm overreacting but fuck. Fuck this bullshit. I'm over it. Or whatever.

Oh yeah. I have four pimple or rashy things on my chest where I keep breaking out. I also think this is bullshit. I need a new wardrobe of only crew neck or higher neck shirts. It will take weeks for these to disappear. It's bullshit.

I'm so gross. FML.

I am a frog in a pot.

I went for my follow up appointment with the eye specialist. Since it was away from my office, I went to lunch at Nourish (gluten-free, soy-free). I noticed they had an "Asian shredded chicken" as one of the choices now so I got my "usual" teriyaki rice bowl but had that instead of the grilled chicken. Um, yum.

I eat it all.

I was going to get dessert (since I can!) but realized I was running short on time so I headed to the doctor's office instead.

And then. I waited an hour in the waiting room and then had a pretty slow visit too so I was there over two hours. Grr.
 

Since the last visit, I've been happy to not have eye pain. I can look to the side without mentally wincing. I didn't even realize that it hurt so much and so constantly until it didn't hurt! I'm like the proverbial frog in the pot of water, not realizing is getting warmer and I'm boiling to death.

 

I took my "bandage" out of my eye and he said that the "skinned knee" looking injury had healed very nicely. Although he compared it to the stuff that accumulates on ice when people are skating. Either way it healed nicely. Yay for that, right?

 

I don't have to use the medicated drops unless I start having issues again like redness in that eye. I do still have to use the eye gel and tape my eyes at night. And he gave me some eye gel drops to use during the day.

 

As we were talking I tried to ask good questions. I may even remember some of it!

 

I asked about the surgery the other doctor had told me about. He confirmed what I was guessing from my limited research. The other doctor is talking about a surgery for protruding eyes. While common with Graves disease, I actually don't have the protruding eyes. My kids are pulled back. There is a different surgery to correct that. He expects that I will need it but he only wants to do it once so he is waiting for my Graves disease to "run its course" and stabilize. It is just surgery on the eyelid, nothing to do with the bones.

 

I was a little annoyed that this condition is commonly seen in Graves disease but I wasn't warned. Or even told that he was watching for it once he started the process of elimination. I guess they can't warn about everything that is associated with what I'm diagnosed with but it seems like I get everything that is commonly associated with what I've already got. It's annoying. Scary. Anger inducing.

 

I try not to say why me but it sure is hard to avoid that attitude when things keep going the wrong way, one thing on top of the next. It sometimes feels like, when it comes to my health, if it can go wrong, it will.

*****

I needed new tires and the Toyota dealership is reminding me. We have a good relationship with Discount Tire so I decided to go there. The price wasn't better but they do warranty and I was exhausted, unsure I would get into the dealership before our trip, etc. So I proceeded. But they only had 3 of the 4 I needed; they had to bring one from another store. I asked about Wi-Fi and he told me to go over to McDonald's and they would call me.

I was at McD for about an hour and decided to go back to wait. It was really busy so I sat and continued to wait. And then it cleared out. And I was still waiting. Reading, but waiting. So I asked when my car would be ready and it apparently had been done for a while. They called and left a message on my home phone and claimed that they called my cell but it didn't show up at all, not as missed or message or anything. Argh! I just wasted at least an hour of time while I'm all stressed out about the zillion things I need to get done. And it's my fault for not checking when I came back.

Drops

So on my way home after the appointment with the eye specialist yesterday, I was supposed to go to Walgreens to get my medicated drops.

 

But I totally forgot. Not only did I forget--I went to JCPenney to exchange something and buy bras in a bigger size (I've been wearing the wrong size since I gained this 20 pounds) and I forgot about the exchange. Alright then.

 

So today I had my appointment with Dr. Q for my adjustments. It was a weird appointment. The "work" was the usual but... First, I waited about half an hour and they took his NEXT appointment so I had to ask if I got skipped and I had so they had to kind of push me back into the line-up.

 

Then he and his students talked about some shit going on with the school's administration and I learned way too much about how the doctors and students are used and abused. For example, if the students arrange (as is encouraged) to have hours at the doctor's office, the doctor doesn't get anything at all--money, acknowledgement, whatever.

 

Apparently, a few doctors were fired very publicly and it seems in quite bad taste but also could be damaging to their reputations although it sounds as though it was more over disagreements than something that should damage them. Anyway...

 

When I left, I went to Walgreens near my office so I wouldn't drive all the way home without getting my medicated eye drops again. I went to Pita Jungle for lunch while I waited. When I returned, someone was getting a flu vaccine and was asked about being allergic to eggs. Ah yes, I can always use that as my reason for not getting the vaccine. Thank the Lord I never got one. I can't imagine how sick it would have made me.

 

Well, the Walgreens did not have the drops! They called another Walgreens for me to go pick them up at. In the opposite direction of where I was headed. Nice. But I got them and got home. That was almost a waste of a work at home day. (Since I was in the office neighborhood, it didn't save any drive time; I did still manage to put some hours in...)

Nacho Business

I had brisket packed up with some mashed potatoes and barbecue sauce to bring for lunch today. When I opened my dish, I was really disappointed to see that I (am ridiculously oblivious) brought the dish that only had leftover brisket I was going to eat over the weekend. I had some of it for lunch anyway but I couldn't eat all that.

And then I was even more disappointed. I was working so hard all day that my brisket got thrown out when the receptionist cleaned out the refrigerator. Is it okay to cry over brisket?

*****

Did you know that people sometimes get in other people's business?

I know right? It came as a complete shock to me, too! :)

As hard as I try to avoid the drama, I witnessed a WTF moment today. I came out of a meeting in someone else's office and walked past the printer on the way to my office. Someone was standing there at the printer. I originally thought she was going through the pages to get whatever she printed (presumably everything possible, one-sided of course) but I noticed she was just standing there looking at the page on top of the stack in her hand. I thought it was weird but whatever. Then I caught the header. It was an email addressed to someone else. From another person. WOW. How is that your business, your right, your anything?

Even worse, I was so dumbfounded that I didn't say anything. And I really should have. Maybe it's not my place, but if not mine, whose?

Mrs. Whites

We went for haircuts and my hairdresser says that my hair IS getting fuller. I thought maybe I was getting better at doing my hair but she is certain that it is filling in. Hell yeah!

 

We were going to meet my grandparents and family for lunch for my grandma's birthday. She was so funny when she called, letting me know they were going to meet at Mrs. White's and "you can eat there, right?" I'm thinking, hell no, I can't eat soul food, what are you thinking, but I just said I'll eat later if I can't.

 

Then I got all crazy and took food but Mick thought I should leave it in the car until I knew if I could eat or not. Well, my grandparents have known the family who owns and operates the restaurant for-frickin-evah. I don't know if that made a difference or not. But they totally accommodated me.

 

I had a chicken fried steak without the chicken fried--so I had steak and onions. I also had black eye peas and beans since all the other sides have flour and/or butter. And don't forget the sweet tea.

Yep, no veggies.


 

There was a little family drama but very...understated. When we got there, only my grandpa's family was there so we sat together. The kids hadn't seen us in a while so it took a while for them to warm up to us, but they did.


I have awesome hair (when a professional does it). I also have rabbit ears.

My cousin told us some interesting thing about how he gets baptized for dead people so they don't go to hell or something like that. I guess it's a Mormon thing. I'm sure I'm misstating it but he got baptized like 30 times one day.

I got baptized once. I was 14. God talked to me; it was like a feeling of peace came over me, which was unbelievable to me after such a tumultuous life.* I was saved by the blood of Christ and baptized in the Baptist Church. Amen.

*(Yes, in case you don't know me IRL or haven't heard anyway, I lived in hell on earth when I was a kid. Fortunately, there were moments of non-hellness which kept me from complete insanity. Escaping in books and looking out for my sister and, later my cousins, helped a lot too. But FML started really early for me. And repeated way too often.)

Anyhoo.

We had a large enough group that we needed at least a couple large tables. So almost everyone came in with my grandparents and sat with them, except my uncle J who came to sit with us. He's always fun to chat with.

Then my grandparents' friends came in so room was made by some people going to another table instead of ours. Most of them never said anything to us.
 

I went out of my way to talk to my aunt P as people started leaving. She made some weird comment about my Facebook being all photos of food.

 

Huh. I had no idea.

 

Because it's not true!

 

I had to check but it's been four months since I posted a food photo and that was when I posted photos of our garden bounty and what I made with it.

 

Whatever.

 

At least she hasn't unfriended me like my other aunt. True story. Can't make this shit up.

 

Later we went to my friend's party. I took food "just in case" and was assured I wouldn't need it. Her house is one of the most likely places I can eat, but they don't live my life so there are some misses. I grabbed like half the guacamole before it got contaminated with bagel chips or whatever those things were. I couldn't eat the soy sauce doused chicken though. I ate plenty throughout the evening so I can't complain. I'm just a PITA. Not a pita chip like they were using in the guacamole. Just a PITA.

Low. And sick?

The more I need to do, the less motivated I am to get it done. Why? (I don't have any great insight; I'm just wondering.)

I made this mug pancake with sausage links for breakfast.  I don't think this can be an everyday meal. But this is a good, interesting way to have some oats in the morning.  I tried it yesterday with almond flour and it was okay but I liked the oats (ground up to flour) better.

Looks messy, tastes pretty good.

I slept with my eye mask upside down hoping it would keep my eyes closed. I think it may have but it was uncomfortable since the nose piece was in the wrong place. The tighter part of the mask was across my eyes so I thought that would help. I woke with my eyes hurting. Usually it's the left eye but the right eye is really bothering me today. I also realized as I was driving into work that my eyesight was very blurry. I got better as the day went on but I'm kind of freaked out. My right eye is in a lot of pain.

It was "smoothie" day at work. These girls do not have it figured out yet.

I had a doctor appointment with the naturopathic doctor. The students E and N asked a bunch of questions and Dr. H came in. My estrogen is in the range but a little high; my testosterone is definitely low. After our Q&A, back and forth, Dr. H prescribed nettle tea and a tincture of elderberry, licorice and a couple other things.

She also had E look for non hormonal ways to increase my testosterone. Among them or have more sex which is circular because you don't want to have sex when you have no testosterone. One of the suggestions is to weight/strength train which has been on my to do list for quite a while; I follow several paleo websites that include information about CrossFit or other weight training . I guess it's time to move forward, proceed, make a plan and do it. Who's with me?

Best of all? She claims I will "feel sexy" when we get my testosterone where it should be. Huh. We'll see about that.

Then I went to the eye specialist. He said I have a scratch on the bottom of my right cornea, which would explain the huge amount of pain I'm having. I also have a scratch on the top of the left cornea, but he said it was more like a "skinned knee" so not so much a scratch as my eye is totally fucked up. He really didn't explain why this happened except that I have Grave's disease and open my eyes in my sleep. He claimed I wasn't making it worse by wearing the eye mask.

So you are going to LOVE this. (That is in sarcasm font, right?)

He said I don't have to wear the eye mask unless I want to. Well, why would I want to wear an eye mask if I don't have, you might ask. Because I have to start taping my fucking eyes shut when I go to sleep. I am so not kidding.

I just had a doctor tell me I am going to feel sexier, and the next doctor tells me to tape. my. eyes. shut. when I go to bed. with my husband. Um yeah, I WILL be wearing an eye mask over this freak show.

And. Like that's not enough. I had to order the tape online because Walgreen's and CVS and Target and Walmart don't have it. (The doctor acted like I could just go out there and get it.) There may have been a woman who looked just like me who was crying in the aisle at one of those stores but I will not confirm or deny that.

So FML.

I also went to a baking class at Nourish. It was "allergen" free--no wheat, soy, yeast, corn, eggs, dairy. I can have corn but still. It was more of a demo and tasting, not a hands-on learn how to bake. However, I learned a lot from Chef Dan. The downside is that they are still figuring out this baking stuff too, so some of the recipes tasted gluten-free. That means I wouldn't make them. But the millet cake, which was very cornbread like, was great and he served it with honey and coconut butter. I really like that idea. Although this was not a "sweet" cake, it was my favorite thing of the night.

Millet cake

The whole cake. Mmm, frosting.

cake

 

Looks good!

The Chef

 

Spice cake, maple frosting



apple crisp



It's my birthday. Weekend.

I started my birthday weekend with a pedicure. Blue toenails in August--perfect.

We went to Nourish with Mick's family. With the exception of the Celiac among them, I think they kind of hate it. The service was pretty terrible--we were there over two hours--but I loved the food. And I got dessert. But the kids couldn't have soda so that wasn't a good start. He liked the burger and she liked the sweet potato fries. There was unhappiness and anxiety about the time everything took. My husband says the food is okay but he got something that had vegetables and seaweed in it so he said it's like eating at home but I haven't picked out the stuff he won't eat. Yeah, he doesn't like it because he wants to eat "bad" when he goes out.

I guess next time I'll take them somewhere more mainstream like Outback. Sigh.

Sunday, we went with friends to see 2 Guns--my boy Denzel! After, we went to Carrabbas. It's not open for lunch during the week but apparently it is on the weekend. They have a gluten free menu but not any g/f pasta. However, something rare happened: I can have the soup that's always on the menu. They just leave out the pasta.

YES, it was good!

Then I had salmon with salsa and veggies. And the veggies had a bunch of garlic (looks kind of like cheese, right? I was kinda freaking out but it really was garlic.) That's a pretty good lunch.

And they didn't skimp on the veggies.

Later, at home, I had a pint of ice cream to celebrate. I should NOT have done that.

Lunch Mats

I know y'all think I'm paranoid, so I'd like to confirm that for you today.

At work, we have a small glass table in our kitchen. In case you want to visualize it, it has the pastel 80s colored desert pattern chairs and gold color base that originally came with it. The office manager is always upset about the state of the toaster oven, the microwave, people leaving stuff in the sink or putting stuff in the dishwasher incorrectly... Now that you have that picture...

Lots of people bring things to share so they put them on the table and people, well, they do what they do. When I go in there, I see crumbs.

There are plastic place mats in the middle of the table to help with keeping the glass clean. I have no idea how often or how well they get cleaned. So I've been using a large paper towel as my place mat. After washing the area of the table I'm going to use.

Or I avoid the kitchen and go out. But that's not a great solution.

So I'm trying this one. I got these Matooga place mats (see, I have found something useful on Pinterest!) that fold up and include napkins. I got two packs of 3 and they threw in a freebie so I have more than enough for each week. Then I can throw them in the wash and start over.

Mine in front; theirs in back

I hope my little investment will save me money eating out.

You think I'm paranoid, don't you? I haven't taken my own toaster oven supplies yet! (...yet...)

Grocery Shopping--Enjoy your life much? edition

Last night, I went to Sprouts for double ad Wednesday. I got some awesomeness.

I had already gone to the Farmer's Market at lunchtime before going to the dentist, so some of the produce is from the farmers market and some from Sprouts.

veggies and fruit

NEW. Cooking spray. NO SOY!

I can't figure out the difference.

Can you?

NEW!
Large size g/f nuggets
Litehouse freeze-dried Lemongrass
An alfredo sauce I can eat!

When I got to the meat department, I had to ask the guy there for something that was on sale that wasn't out. He was putting meatloaf out for sale and trying to talk everyone into getting one. Of course, I can't eat it for at least three reasons. So when he said something to me for the second time about it, I said I can't eat it. It has cheese on it. And he gives me that look. Like I have two heads. Sigh. I can't have cheese. And then he said...

"How do you enjoy life then?"

REALLY? I mean, I know my life is different and fucked up, but I can't enjoy life because I don't eat cheese? Are you fucking kidding me? Is this what it has come to--is this why "everyone" is fat? We aren't enjoying life unless we are stuffing our face with cheese? O. M. F. G.

FML.

Roast chicken and portabellini pizzas

I bought a whole chicken and needed to get it cooked. I decided on a version of a recipe from Practical Paleo but instead of her spice mix, I used TJ's 21 seasoning and instead of ghee (which I can't have) I used duck fat. (You can find it at Whole Foods--it seems expensive but I use it pretty slowly and in small amounts so it goes pretty far.)

Paleo chicken

While it was cooking, I made portabellini pizzas. I used some leftover pizza sauce, chopped pepperoni and chopped artichoke hearts.

ready to bake

I baked them in the toaster oven since the chicken was in the other oven. I don't know why I always forget that I have it. Maybe because my husband always uses it for his gluteny stuff and it rarely gets cleaned so I feel kind of yucky. But the pan is foil lined so it should be fine. It's not like I'm paranoid or something! LOL.

ready to eat

And the chicken is finally ready. And it is really good. Unfortunately, the seasoning is on the skin which I don't really eat. Next time I will try to figure out that thing where people put the seasoning under the skin.

Update: So Mick tells me he doesn't like chicken. He's not at all interested in eating this. WTH. I totally blame his parents. Ha-ha. Not really--his brother will eat anything. Mick does eat chicken but he doesn't eat chicken on the bone. It's so weird. He even does that with chicken wings. So I have lunch for a week. All for me. I'll have to remember that every time I make whole chicken, I get it all to myself.