This post is bullshit.

This post is whiny. And there is a LOT of cursing. Feel free to skip it.

Monday

O. M. F. G.

F. F. F. F.

I love my job. I love my job. I love my job.

So we have this five hour annual meeting, mandatory attendance for all employees in all of our offices. Of course, since we have multiple offices, I thought "I can work at home and video conference the meeting." That totally makes sense given that we will be having a videoconference meeting.

Or maybe it doesn't and my idea of what makes sense is totally off base.

There was a menu sent around for the lunch order. For Paradise Bakery. What the goddamn fuck. Like I could possibly eat anything from there.* I replied that I was planning to work at home. I got a response back that it would have to be okay with the person copied on the mail. Since he didn't say no, I thought it was a yes. Oh, my word, I am such a fucking idiot.

So the menu went out again today for those of us who haven't ordered. And I say that I'm working at home. And I can't eat anything from there. But thanks. And then I get the "you can't work at home unless it's approved." And the "approver" emails "people can work from home another day, they should be in the office for this meeting." [Yes, I know there should be a semi-colon but that is how he wrote it.]

While I am sending a response that I misunderstood and I'll bring my own lunch, I get ANOTHER. FUCKING. EMAIL requesting my order. From the same person. The one I have already told at LEAST twice that I can't eat that crap. Are you fucking with me? Holy hell, what is wrong with you? If you were in this office right now, I would probably have to leave to keep from smacking the crap outta you and calling you names.

This bullshit is bullshit. Every damn day is hard enough for me without this bullshit. Fuck you all. No, really. FUCK YOU.

Then she says that "If there is a place you can grab takeout, please do so and give the receipt to [office manager] for reimbursement. Every employee should have a meal regardless of their dietary restrictions. :)"

YES SHE DID. Yes, she did say that bullshit. And! Yes, she did put a fucking smile face emoticon. Every employee should have a meal regardless of their dietary restrictions? REALLY?!

Really. Where has this policy been for the last year? Or two.

*Our Friday "lunchtime learning" where they order lunch every other week and I have been able to eat ONCE gets on my last goddamn nerve. Last week, when I was going to be out of town, they ordered from the ONE. PLACE. THEY. ORDER. FROM. THAT HAS FOOD I CAN EAT. What the fucking hell, people? I even asked if they could get something else and order that next time and they just smiled at me like I'm some little kid they don't want to upset so they won't say no but they aren't going to give me what I want either. I fucking hate people. All of you. Hate you all. Fuck off.

 

So I asked if I would have time to leave and come back without missing anything. And under my breath in my inside voice I said since it is so fucking important for us to be together as a group in only three locations and not four.

Yep, there is a whole half hour that people will be eating lunch while I can go GET MY LUNCH. AND COME BACK. But "people will continue eating" when the presentation starts back up. Yeah, as long as the trough has food in it, people will keep mindlessly eating. (Sorry, feeling a little judgmental right now.)

I know it's not her fault that I'm a freak pain in the ass freaky McFreakster, but still, this whole thing is fucking bullshit. I'm tired of feeling singled out or left out. Why does everything have to center around food all the damn time anyway?

Maybe I'm overreacting but fuck. Fuck this bullshit. I'm over it. Or whatever.

Oh yeah. I have four pimple or rashy things on my chest where I keep breaking out. I also think this is bullshit. I need a new wardrobe of only crew neck or higher neck shirts. It will take weeks for these to disappear. It's bullshit.

I'm so gross. FML.