September update

Oh, the things that happened this month:

• birthday party for my niece's daughter
• Labor Day swimming at my cousin's
• (always) Dr. Q
• webinar on natural treatments--mostly talking about mushrooms (I don't have time for more crazy #justsaying)
• endocrinologist appointment--she was not impressed with how quickly my primary doctor reduced my thyroid meds so she asked me to come back next month for new labs; I am currently taking 100 mcg of Levothyroxine (Synthroid)
• work dinner Olive and Ivy--pretty good, and accommodating
• went to Becketts Table and it wasn't as good as I remember, kind of weird actually; a small, tasty piece of salmon on a plate of carrots and a side of green beans after I was done eating.
• went to my niece's daughter's and son's birthday party at a park

cat in a bag - tongue out Tinker

sandwich on Bread SRSLY (a gift!) #giddy

sandwich on a Bread SRSLY roll #happiness

Sleeping Cassi--but I missed the photo contest deadline

Mmm, bacon--the low sodium has a shorter ingredient list.

Fruit!

Bacon, and bacon wrapped apricots #yum

No weird ingredients--a Costco find!

The tri-tip after cooking #nomnom

roasted asparagus

My major malfunction has been the eye doctor/glasses shopping. This seems like a short, simple process for most people. However, I:

• went to the eye doctor, got a glasses prescription, 
• went to Costco and found frames, had glasses and sunglasses made, 
• picked up new glasses and sunglasses, couldn't see but they said it was the prescription,
• went back to adjust (the ear piece was painful),
• went back to the eye doctor but they just had me see one of the technicians in the front and said it was probably the coating on the lenses (#WTF), 
• went back to Costco where they checked the prescription and sent the glasses back to be remade, but not the sunglasses, 
• picked those up and still couldn't see, 
• made and had an appointment with my friend's eye doctor at another Costco, got a new prescription, 
• got my glasses and sunglasses remade, picked up the glasses first,
• picked up the sunglasses and had the glasses in for an adjustment.

I got this style of sunglasses

I still need to take the sunglasses in for adjustment as one of the arms is too loose, but seriously, who else goes through this kind of crazy to cross ONE ITEM OFF MY LIST? I cope but I hate that this is my normal. An item on my to-do list took me two months to accomplish. I can't wait to do it again next year! #Ispeaksarcasm

Saddle Mountain Brewery

Last night, we went to our neighbor's grand opening. As I understand it, this is the first brewery to open in Goodyear. The service was terrible but it looks promising and hopefully they will work it all out. Mick invited our friend M, which surprised me since he doesn't drink (and some other reasons outside the scope of this blog), but it is a restaurant too. My SIL called and said Dr. Q told her to go out with me this weekend so I invited her too since Mick had already invited M. YES, my doctor told my SIL, who I sent to him, to go out with me.

I had sweet tea and a bunless burger with a "bare" side salad. My dinner came much later than everyone else's (pretty sure they messed it up and had to remake it) so I forgot to take a photo. The salad actually came first but since it had no dressing, I thought I'd wait. It was spring mix and spinach with cranberries and tomatoes. I finally decided I couldn't wait and ate most of by the time my burger arrived. The salad and burger were good. I think Mick and M really liked their pizzas and my SIL liked her sandwich. M and my SIL got a flight of beers and found one they both liked.

Even with the service hiccups, we had fun. They came back to our house to hang out a little before heading home.

Yep!

Today, I got my hair color done--wash those grays away! I mentioned to a couple people, including Mick, that I was thinking of going a little redder. Since I have some red undertones anyway, my hairdresser said she wanted to mix my old brown color in with the redder color this time, see how it takes, and then go all with the new color next time. It turned out fantastic.

When I came home, he told me he doesn't like the color. WTH. Can a wife get a muther-effin compliment in here? (The answer to that is NO, in case you don't know.)

Update: I have a photo on tomorrow's post if you want to see the color. No compliments necessary. I got them from M (who knew I was having it done) and my coworker/friend J (who did not know I was getting it done.)

Update 2: I sent Mick the free head shot I got at my recent conference and he replied with a comment about "hottie" so apparently I CAN get a muther-effin compliment! A little more often would be nice but I guess that's what I have friends for.

Successful or happy

My naturopathic chiropractor, Dr. Q kind of acts as my therapist while he is adjusting my everything and dealing with how my body holds stress. I like getting his (male) perspective, even though I know to a degree it must be biased because he only hears my side of whatever we are discussing. But he knows how it makes me feel--my body is telling him!

I usually lay on the table face down, then face up, but today, he had me stand first while he did adjustments on my shoulders and arms. Then we moved to the table. I had some painful areas that might be sore later.

Chasing Success or Happiness

Don't make it your own

I had my first scheduled appointment with Dr. Q since my emergency visit. He says I'm doing really well...

Actually, he says I am/my body is dealing with things better than I used to. After working on me today, he basically said that the amount of "stuff" I'm carrying around would have put me in so much pain a couple years ago that I'd be in bed but I'm dealing with it much better now.

On the other hand, he said I need to be careful. I'm dealing better so it's easier to take more on, except that it's not good for me and I could hit a breaking point and set me back a lot. Yikes. That would suck.

We had talked about a lot of other people's issues, as I'm dealing with and/or supporting my friends through what they've got going on. It's not about any one person but I am trying to be a better friend and he thinks I'm taking too much on. He told me "don't make it your own." Hmmm. Am I making it my own? I'll have to be mindful of what I take on I guess.

Health Notes

You know there's nothing good to say when I have a post just about my health. You're welcome to skip it!

via thebloggess via Pinterest

I'm bloated. I'm uncomfortable. It comes and goes but mostly comes and doesn't go. I feel fat. I'm gaining weight. I'm eating less and gaining weight. I'm eating less because I feel blechy in my tummy. I don't feel hungry or I'm ravenous, and not much in between. When I am hungry, I'm not hungry for anything in particular--everything sounds meh.

Smelling someone else's food I can't have sometimes pulls me out of it but for the most part, I've felt crappy for a couple weeks. It's making me grumpy. I'm hoping I'm not being super-irritable. But I probably am....

Every other day, or more, I look pregnant, I'm so bloated. I'm not eating things I'm not supposed to eat so I don't understand what is happening. I'm up to 180 now. I want to cry. Or punch something. Or both. It fucking sucks.

And I get to function like a normal person in my life. Cause really, no one cares. No one wants to hear about it. The people who care, they think they do, but really, who wants to hear this shit every day? Literally, this shit. Of course, I'm having trouble in that area. Nothing, then everything. Over and over. It's the old cycle.

I haven't developed all the pain issues I used to have but I definitely am feeling some of it. And...I'm terrified. It makes me sad to write that but...

I'm getting the familiar pulling in my lowlow back, down my left leg, making it difficult to walk normally. So I overcompensate and then my right leg hurts and people want to know why I'm limping. Now both my knees hurt and I have shooting pain down my left butt and leg. Yay.

That is a weird combination with the numbness. Mostly in my left foot and calf but it comes and goes other places too. And of course in my fingers. Sometimes my hands. It's not total numbness--I can still feel but it's not...right. It's distracting. And sometimes things slip. Or I can't open something that should be easy. It's tiring.

And my neck hurts. And my head. I'll wake up with a headache. This is why I'll never be a morning person. When you wake up with a headache, sleep is so much better than anything...anything else. A bath, adult beverages, sex , bacon...none of it is more appealing than sleep. I know, sucks to be my husband, right?

My chiropractor gave me hand exercises for my weakness. And I've started doing yoga again. (Mick couldn't believe I paid for the DVD sets for Namaste Yoga but it's not on TV anymore AND I lost the episode I had on the DVR when it was replaced.)

I don't want to be negative, but I don't think anything is working. I'm discouraged. I'm fighting hard to stay away from that bitch, depression. But I am...worn down. Sad. Frustrated. Overwhelmed. All the words I use every time....That other bitch, MS, teams up with depression and makes it all so damn hard.

In case that wasn't enough, my period, which comes too close together anyway, came early. I can't even get three full weeks in between periods and it fucking comes early! WTF. FML.

The pie and the elbow macaroni

Is almost the holiday weekend. We will be attending the neighborhood progressive pool party. My internal dialog killed me today. I wanted to go to the gluten free bakery for treats because YUM and everyone else will be eating yummy things so why not me. But...I shouldn't go to the bakery because I'm a size (ahem, or two) larger than last year. It sucks!

 

I went under the mental guise of getting pizza crusts, which I got. Along with vegan blueberry muffins, cupcakes and cookies. And an apple pie! I don't know why this was so appealing but...fourth of July...apple pie...

 

I went to Whole Foods for a green juice to make up for my treats I bought but hadn't even eaten yet. Then I was on to Walgreens to pick up my prescription. Although I had finished the juice, I was hungry.

 

I sometimes go to Pita Jungle when I go to Walgreens so I went. I thought I'd probably take some leftovers. Or not.

When the food runner brought my plates, the veggies looked good but the chicken tikka masala looked different than usual. I waited for the waiter and he said they had changed it so I requested that he confirm my allergens again. He came back and have me the okay so I started eating. The cabbage did not speak to me so I stayed removing it and saw this.

 

An elbow macaroni. Wheat. WTF.

 

I ate my veggies (I was hungry, going on hangry) and the waiter finally came back. He thought I didn't like it. I told him about the wheat and I couldn't eat it. He brought me done tea to go and they picked up my check. Gah! Why do I eat out?

 

Why do I eat at all? I can't remember the last time I went more than a day without gas, bloating, constipation, and/or diarrhea. I'm pretty sure that has something to do with my weight gain but it sounds like an excuse.

 

After returning to the office for a while, I went for my monthly visit for the drug trial. Vitals, blood and urine, oh my. I asked about my MRI results and she said she would get them and email me.

 

Next I went to see Dr. Q for some adjusting. My back on the left lower area was so tender. He asked if I was taking magnesium and I said I've had too much digestive issues. (Magnesium supplements can cause diarrhea for some people, like me.) He recommended a topical magnesium (a nickel size amount daily) so I bought this.

 

Somehow I ended up reporting complaining about my sweatiness and odor. He recommended a specific roll on sold at Whole Foods, so I went there next.

I bought the one that looked most like his description but I'm pretty sure this isn't it. I think it is supposed to be taller and not a crystal. Sigh.

 

I was hungry going in and we all know that is a big mistake but I really needed to pee before going home so that is how I ended up at Whole Paycheck while hungry.

 

And I got some margeza sausage for dinner and made our with some Lundberg lentils and rice. I added green olives to mine. Not bad. The rice and lentils didn't really do it for me but I liked the sausage once it was out of the casing. Because casings are gross.

 

You know what else is gross? (You've been warned...)

 

I have to wear tops that cover my chest. I wore this today. It's fine and comfortable (I LOVE these shoes) but it sucks trying on everything looking for something to cover my freakiness.

 

I keep getting these gross things on my chest area, kind of like acne but it doesn't seem to be preventable or treatable and it takes weeks to go away and then it starts again. This has been going on for years. I'm so DONE. I can't figure it out. This is the worst so far--FOUR of them. FML.

Those aren't moles.

My awesomeness can't be contained.

 

Must have been a rough weekend

I have been to the toilet three times already today. No wonder I felt so meh yesterday. I'm trying to think of what I ate. Was it the point of gluten free cookies and cream ice cream? The beef tacos? The blueberry coconut milk yogurt? The Friday night beverage of pineapple coconut juice with 1800 coconut tequila? The waffles, nectarines and sausage? The orange juice?

Could it be, as my naturopathic doctors suggest, stress related? Now that I've decided not to blog about people, it may seem that I have no stress, but in reality, I still hate people. I hate the stupid things they do, the way they don't own up to it, the excuses, trying to cover it up.

I hate that I am supposedly intimidating. That being intimidated by me is not viewed as a ploy, a deception, a manipulation.

I hate this game. The what is wrong with me game. It's tiring. Unending. Ridiculous.

Maybe it's time to detox. That might work on the food issues but not as likely on the people issues.

If only.

I've made comments to my hubby about the time he will be gone and I'll be home alone for 5 days. Yeah, I probably shouldn't let him in on how much I'm looking forward to my alone time. And it's not that I don't want him around obviously! It's complicated and probably beyond explanation here. The best I can do is say I have more control and less uncertainty. (In case you don't know me IRL, I should clarify this is not really related to my DH but some peripheral consequences of our life. Cryptic much?!)

Oh my back.

I had a huge knot in my back. Huge. So painful. Dr. Q really knows how to find the most painful spots and work on them. Damn him! Or bless him!

 

I asked about something I could do for my noticeable increasing hand weakness. He told me to ball up a couple of athletic socks and squeeze to fatigue. I have to make sure to stay with my hand lower than level so it is not elevated into a carpal tunnel position.

Paying to be tortured

There are things wrong with me. But you knew that. Let me start over.

There are things wrong with my body. I don't mean that in a "OMG, I'm so ugly or flawed" kind of way but in a "my body could work SO much better, couldn't it" kind of way. Cause even a young lady like Lorde will tell you that it's okay to be flawed.

Anyway, things hurt. And don't work quite right. And all that stuff. My right shoulder pops nearly constantly. My hips, mostly on the right but not always, get stiff and pop several times a day. My left eye is twitching and the eyelid feels pinched, and both eyes alternate between dryness and watering to the point I look like I'm crying. My fingers are numb-ish. My left foot and calf are numb-ish most of the time.

In case you are new here, I say numb-ish because the area doesn't feel normal, but I can also feel it. It's like a waiting zone in between feeling and not feeling. I gather it's an MS thing, but Dr. Q thinks it's a stress thing. Well, he kind of thinks everything is a stress thing. The coming and going nature of it makes it hard to disagree with him except that...MS.

Oh, MS, you bitch. Symptoms of MS come and go. I've been thinking about this recently...and I don't want to read up on it. At what point does remitting relapsing MS become one of the other more serious types of progressive MS? The reason I'm thinking about this is because my MS doctors seems completely unconcerned with my symptoms which used to come for short periods and then go away for long periods of time but now are more here than gone. With RRMS, you generally/mostly recover from each exacerbation before the next one. One of the types of progressive MS is a progressive worsening of symptoms over time with little recovery. At what point do I throw in the towel and say I am never going to get better from these symptoms?

So I know that is a total tangent...but it gives you an idea of the worries in my (holey) brain. And then Dr. Q tells me that I'm a thinker and that stress is why I'm having all these physical symptoms. I'm paraphrasing, but I'm pretty sure he just told me to stop thinking, worrying, and being myself. :)

Today's adjustments were so effing painful. My back (which was the least of my worries) was all messed up and it hurt like hell when he was adjusting it with his activator. (An activator looks like a play gun and makes a popping sound; he does not "rack and crack" me.) My back was so tender. It's amazing to me that I don't really notice that until we're trying to fix it.

He also did that finger on the side of my face pressure thingy that hurts like some kind of medieval torture. But my eye felt so much better when I left. So much better. This is why I pay for torture. I know it's not permanent, but it helps.

Back to Dr. Q

A few months ago, my appointment at the college with my naturopathic chiropractor was cancelled. Not rescheduled--cancelled. I was told to call back. If you know anything about my to-do list, you can already guess that I did not call for quite a while. When I finally called, they told me he was no longer there.

O_O

They gave me his number and I called to schedule an appointment. I had to leave a message. I was surprised when he called me back. It took a minute for me to realize it was him and another minute for him to figure out I am me.

His office location is very near my work location. It is a small office and it appears that he has no staff. I had to wait a little while he finished with someone else.

He has this interesting table that goes perpendicular to the floor. I stepped on the "plate" with my front against it and then it moves to a horizontal position. Totally freaky but yay technology. It is a higher table. It is also a wider table than used at the college.

The treatment was essentially the same. He spent a lot of time on my neck and head. Stress much?

He is running my insurance to see what they cover so I just paid a "co-pay" which will apply against my deductible. If this is cheaper than the out-of-pocket at the college, I'm going to be irritated.

Getting stabby

The results are in and there is totally something, ahem, everything, wrong with me.
 

I have a little bit of candida but bacterial overgrowth is more of an issue.

She recommends calcium bentonite clay; it absorbs toxins and inhibits bacteria growth better than charcoal. Arise and shine brand is highly recommended. I have to take a half teaspoon in a large glass of water no more than once a day.

She also gave me a tincture, something soothing that will still kill some yeast. I have to take one dropper in water once daily and increase to two teaspoons twice a day. Unless I feel irritated or yucky--then I should not increase. (Don't I always feel irritated or yucky!? ha-ha.)
 

She says my dismeria (PMS) should decrease when all these other things get killed off.
 

So, the bigger scarier news is that my doctor is moving to Sedona. I will have to start seeing a new doctor. She gave me a couple of recommendations for doctors at the school, trying to stick with those that can work the balancing act of many issues but none that need to be attacked with force. Because I'm sensitive, you know. At least my GI tract is.
 

So gross

Dr H ordered tests for me that must be done with fecal samples. I'm pretty sure I've never had to do that before. Maybe I did but I blacked it out.
 

I had to get three different days within no more than seven days. I didn't want to do it at work. It's not so private.
 

And I had to poo into what was essentially a fast food tray, like you might get your chicken strips and fries in. (I know I just ruined strips and fries for you; you're welcome.) Then I had to put some in the vial, which had a "spoon" attached inside the lid.
 

Thursday morning, I had to poo before I left the house. I thought that was great since I'd have Saturday and Sunday for day 2 and 3.
 

Now, I'm sure that doesn't sound TOO bad. But now I have a hot dog tray of poo. I dump it into the toilet; now I have a shitty hot dog tray. I wrap it in a grocery bag and walk out to the trash bin.

Saturday I had my day 2 collection. Same procedure.
 

And then nothing on Sunday. Are you effing kidding?
 

So on Monday, I'm really hoping for the rare early pre-work poo. But no. So I get to do this at work and leave my shit bag in the trash bin in the bathroom. Ew.
 

So I'm in the stall when I realize that there are instructions for the 3 days but I was also given a cup for another test that I am supposed to do the last day. There aren't any instructions. It doesn't have the lid with a spoon and it looks like the cup I pee into at least every month so I take an educated guess and pee in the cup.
 

Wrong guess. I take everything to the lab and I am given a new cup. When I question how I'm supposed to poo in the cup (I know I'm not supposed to poo in the cup but seriously, you're giving me a pee cup for poo), I receive another fry tray. Um. Yay?
 

Since I'd already had diarrhea, I knew I wouldn't go again today.
 

Update: Lucky me, I went poo while I was at home Tuesday morning. I had the foresight to grab a plastic knife for scooping the poo into the cup. Ew. So gross.

More testing, less answers

Temp 98.4

Blood pressure 79/120

Weight 174 (at home)

 

I reported cramping Sunday night. I did Castor oil pack first time. Messy. And then had diarrhea on Monday.

 

Dr. H went over labs and I have no idea now what happened. Okay maybe a little.

• Something about solar plexis and T10 electric
• Testing for Candida
• Recommended no juice and less sugar
• Did hydrotherapy

 Can I just live a normal life yet?

What appointment?

The more I do, the farther behind I get. That doesn't sound right. Let me try again.

As I check things off my list, I get to add several more items. Huh. That didn't sound better.

When I think I'm almost done with something, it gets rescheduled. Well, now, this just isn't working at all.

Last night, Cassi had discharge coming from her hoo-haa. Like dripping, trailing, snotty looking grossness. Poor baby. I added vet to my list. That would be schedule vet, go to vet. Then Mick said he thought that wasn't necessary. Hmm. Okay. I'll leave it on my later list.

I had a big Paleo breakfast of meatballs, sweet potato, apple, almond butter and pumpkin pie coconut butter. So I wasn't all that hungry for lunch. I had a doctor appointment at 1 so I thought I'd eat after.

I did not have a doctor appointment. Well, I did, but I didn't. When I go to the naturopathic college, I pay, then schedule the next appointment if needed. I write it on the receipt and read it back to confirm. When I get to my office, I put the appointment on both my calendars before putting the receipt in my current medical file. This is my ritual since I am not the best at remembering things.

Apparently, Dr. H only works on Thursdays so they wouldn't have scheduled me for a Tuesday appointment. Let's just note here that my last appointment (less than two months ago) was on a Wednesday.

O_O

Yeah, I am rescheduled. I'm guessing they cleared her schedule without checking all the appointments.

So now I'm pissed, I've wasted my time, I'm not really hungry but I know I have to eat since I have class tonight and won't really eat dinner first. I'm near ASU and think there is a Bombay Spice around there. Well, I find it but it's on campus so there is only metered parking. Never freaking mind. But around the corner, I see Thai Basil. I'll try that.

The waitress confirms that the curries are all wheat-free, soy-free, and dairy-free.

red curry with chicken

I like it.

Drops

So on my way home after the appointment with the eye specialist yesterday, I was supposed to go to Walgreens to get my medicated drops.

 

But I totally forgot. Not only did I forget--I went to JCPenney to exchange something and buy bras in a bigger size (I've been wearing the wrong size since I gained this 20 pounds) and I forgot about the exchange. Alright then.

 

So today I had my appointment with Dr. Q for my adjustments. It was a weird appointment. The "work" was the usual but... First, I waited about half an hour and they took his NEXT appointment so I had to ask if I got skipped and I had so they had to kind of push me back into the line-up.

 

Then he and his students talked about some shit going on with the school's administration and I learned way too much about how the doctors and students are used and abused. For example, if the students arrange (as is encouraged) to have hours at the doctor's office, the doctor doesn't get anything at all--money, acknowledgement, whatever.

 

Apparently, a few doctors were fired very publicly and it seems in quite bad taste but also could be damaging to their reputations although it sounds as though it was more over disagreements than something that should damage them. Anyway...

 

When I left, I went to Walgreens near my office so I wouldn't drive all the way home without getting my medicated eye drops again. I went to Pita Jungle for lunch while I waited. When I returned, someone was getting a flu vaccine and was asked about being allergic to eggs. Ah yes, I can always use that as my reason for not getting the vaccine. Thank the Lord I never got one. I can't imagine how sick it would have made me.

 

Well, the Walgreens did not have the drops! They called another Walgreens for me to go pick them up at. In the opposite direction of where I was headed. Nice. But I got them and got home. That was almost a waste of a work at home day. (Since I was in the office neighborhood, it didn't save any drive time; I did still manage to put some hours in...)

Laboring for the weekend

Ah, another Labor Day weekend, come and gone. I think this is the first in many, many years that we did not have a pool party invitation. Not even family.

Except for Friday night, I stayed home the entire weekend. Oh, Friday night, how exhausting you can be. After my husband and my boyfriend (J/K, it's his college buddy) got it together, we met at the Vig near my office. I've actually never been there; I've been to the Vig Uptown, which is barely farther away. Once I figured out that I was at the wrong location, I met Mick at the right one and we got a table while waiting for our partner in crime and his date. Surprise--it wasn't a date but his "friend" L who he used to date but they are trying to be friends now. I like her a lot but he's my friend so I'm staying out of it.



All you need to know is posole.

I was able to have Tito's with fresh squeezed orange juice. Well, I had two. I should have only had one. I didn't have a drink at our next stop. L drove my "electric car" there.

Anyhoo, I had ceviche while Mick had fundido and they had wings. The waitress brought corn tortillas for me; the corn chips went to the table.



R and I both ordered the posole. It was a giant bowl of soupy goodness. I will go there with anyone, anytime now that I know I can have that. (Watch, the next time I go someone will tell me I can't have it because it has X in it, where X is one of the dirty 8 I can't have.)


Jenga!

We headed to the Woody Owl for some Jenga playing. These had things written on them like my Truth or Dare set. I have a couple of sets but I really think "they" need to make a giant outdoor set for me.

We walked over to Milagro Grill. It was not at all busy enough for a Friday night. But we had some chips and a hot salsa flight--the waitress brought corn tortillas out for me instead of chips. I was only able to have one of the salsas because they do use soy in some of them and one had cream cheese in it. I heard it was good. Mine wasn't even the hottest but it was plenty hot for me. We also shared some guacamole--yum. And she made me a Milagro margarita, also yum.

We were there for a while and then left, took them back to their cars and headed home.

*****

Mick's helpers came Saturday to deal with the busted water softener and the yard work. I feel bad but it's too damn hot for me to be out there helping. I did some kitchen and laundry stuff and then worked on some online stuff. It probably looked like I wasn't doing anything but I was tired after making a quadruple batch of waffles to share with everyone. I had berries and bacon to share too. They liked my special waffles enough to go back for more! That. That is exactly how I want my recipes to work. Even if they aren't MY recipes...

*****

Sunday was more of the same but just me and the hubby.

*****

One of his helpers returned Monday, helping him with finishing up a lot of the Saturday projects. He was also trying to fix my computer. I apparently broke it by leaving it on. (I don't understand this but that's what I've been told--don't leave it on--but I did.) He brought an old video/graphics card and got it running again. Whew!

I really kicked into gear and managed to get several loads of laundry done, cleaned the kitchen again (never ending), and cleaned out most of the refrigerator. I started moving things around in a couple of cabinets, trying to find a good location for my lunchbots and other containers that haven't found a permanent home yet.

I made buckwheat and sausage for breakfast (enough for a few days), coffee creamer, cherry sauce and cherry Garcia ice cream, hot Italian sausage pasta (Mick was not a fan of the kale I threw in, trying to use it up--shocking, I know.) I also made these morning glory muffins from the allergy cookbook I borrowed from the library. They came out okay but seemed overcooked. Yes, that does mean dry. What now? Do I try again or throw out the recipe? I may try another first...

muffins

My back was killing me so I tried to take lots of breaks but I was also somewhat motivated to get stuff done. It's hard to listen to the pain when you're raring to go. And too often in pain.

If it's not my aching back, it's my eyes. Or this weekend, my ears. O. M. F. G. I woke up one day with my left ear hurting so freaking bad. It finally stopped and I realized the right ear had been hurting but I hadn't noticed because of the excruciating pain in the left. The right ear just got worse. Or maybe it seemed worse cause the left wasn't hurting so much, I don't know. Two days so far, and it is slightly better. But it hurts to swallow. This is the shit Dr. Q has been "adjusting" my face to deal with. I think my new eye ask may be putting pressure on the wrong places. I wonder if I can sell a "gently used" eye mask.

Update: the jaw/ear is still hurting Tuesday but it is lessening. I also noticed a tightening or pulling ache in the top of my right shoulder. I think it's related. I don't see Dr. Q till next week. I can only pray this corrects itself rather quickly as I really don't want to spend more than a week, almost two, dealing with this.

Low. And sick?

The more I need to do, the less motivated I am to get it done. Why? (I don't have any great insight; I'm just wondering.)

I made this mug pancake with sausage links for breakfast.  I don't think this can be an everyday meal. But this is a good, interesting way to have some oats in the morning.  I tried it yesterday with almond flour and it was okay but I liked the oats (ground up to flour) better.

Looks messy, tastes pretty good.

I slept with my eye mask upside down hoping it would keep my eyes closed. I think it may have but it was uncomfortable since the nose piece was in the wrong place. The tighter part of the mask was across my eyes so I thought that would help. I woke with my eyes hurting. Usually it's the left eye but the right eye is really bothering me today. I also realized as I was driving into work that my eyesight was very blurry. I got better as the day went on but I'm kind of freaked out. My right eye is in a lot of pain.

It was "smoothie" day at work. These girls do not have it figured out yet.

I had a doctor appointment with the naturopathic doctor. The students E and N asked a bunch of questions and Dr. H came in. My estrogen is in the range but a little high; my testosterone is definitely low. After our Q&A, back and forth, Dr. H prescribed nettle tea and a tincture of elderberry, licorice and a couple other things.

She also had E look for non hormonal ways to increase my testosterone. Among them or have more sex which is circular because you don't want to have sex when you have no testosterone. One of the suggestions is to weight/strength train which has been on my to do list for quite a while; I follow several paleo websites that include information about CrossFit or other weight training . I guess it's time to move forward, proceed, make a plan and do it. Who's with me?

Best of all? She claims I will "feel sexy" when we get my testosterone where it should be. Huh. We'll see about that.

Then I went to the eye specialist. He said I have a scratch on the bottom of my right cornea, which would explain the huge amount of pain I'm having. I also have a scratch on the top of the left cornea, but he said it was more like a "skinned knee" so not so much a scratch as my eye is totally fucked up. He really didn't explain why this happened except that I have Grave's disease and open my eyes in my sleep. He claimed I wasn't making it worse by wearing the eye mask.

So you are going to LOVE this. (That is in sarcasm font, right?)

He said I don't have to wear the eye mask unless I want to. Well, why would I want to wear an eye mask if I don't have, you might ask. Because I have to start taping my fucking eyes shut when I go to sleep. I am so not kidding.

I just had a doctor tell me I am going to feel sexier, and the next doctor tells me to tape. my. eyes. shut. when I go to bed. with my husband. Um yeah, I WILL be wearing an eye mask over this freak show.

And. Like that's not enough. I had to order the tape online because Walgreen's and CVS and Target and Walmart don't have it. (The doctor acted like I could just go out there and get it.) There may have been a woman who looked just like me who was crying in the aisle at one of those stores but I will not confirm or deny that.

So FML.

I also went to a baking class at Nourish. It was "allergen" free--no wheat, soy, yeast, corn, eggs, dairy. I can have corn but still. It was more of a demo and tasting, not a hands-on learn how to bake. However, I learned a lot from Chef Dan. The downside is that they are still figuring out this baking stuff too, so some of the recipes tasted gluten-free. That means I wouldn't make them. But the millet cake, which was very cornbread like, was great and he served it with honey and coconut butter. I really like that idea. Although this was not a "sweet" cake, it was my favorite thing of the night.

Millet cake

The whole cake. Mmm, frosting.

cake

 

Looks good!

The Chef

 

Spice cake, maple frosting



apple crisp



Grinder

I went for my routine dental cleaning. My dentist talked to me about my teeth grinding again. He isn't pushing but thinks I should consider a mouth guard instead of my retainer or at least on nights I don't wear my retainer. He's going to have the front desk price it for me.

My naturopathic chiropractor, Dr. QM, also talks to me about grinding my teeth, so I know it's for real. I wake up with headaches/earaches from it sometimes. But it's one more thing to do before bedtime. And in the morning. And one more expense. Sigh.

Magnesium

I was late. I'm usually late when I go to see Dr. Q on my work at home day. It stresses me out. The receptionists get weird about it. But. He. Is. Always. Running. Late. Today is not an exception.

Since he was running so late, the student actually had me lay down and he examined me. That was a first. He didn't do any adjustments but reported to the doctor.

My knee has been bothering me on and off for about a week. Dr. Q. reminded me to up my magnesium. Yeah, I forget what I'm taking for what. Of course the shoulder, the eye, all the normal adjustments. Get more sleep...

Sleeping Teka-roo

Not really working

I wanted to get my hair done before our upcoming trip--my gray is bad and the ends need a trim. When I called to schedule the color, it was hard to find a time so I decided to do it on my work at home day. But I also have my chiropractor appointment that day so I decided I would have to take the day off. But then a meeting was scheduled that I would have to be in the office in the middle of the day. Are you as exhausted as I am?

So I got my color done and my hair looks fabulous. The best it will look until I have it done again. She recommends that I use the flat iron more often to smooth it. That means I have to dry my hair in the morning. I'll think about it.

Then I head to the office for my meeting. A couple of hours in the office and then on the road again.

I get to the chiropractor and have my adjustments. He recommends every 2-3 weeks. The next available appointment is 5 weeks. Huh.

For dinner, I made this packaged Carnitas from Costco for a burrito, smothered in (safe) enchilada sauce. (It's sold in a jar at Albertson's.)

Happy 11th birthday to Cassi.

So tired...