Last year, the endocrinologist started throwing around terms like Graves disease, but said I didn't have it yet. More recently, about 2 visits ago, she changed her mind and suggested I get a "baseline" exam at the special eye doctor. Last visit, she asked if I scheduled it yet, and I had not, so I did right away.
Today, I went to the special eye doctor. I waited for about half an hour and then the assistant asked some questions. Since I recently changed thryoid medications, I couldn't remember the name, just how it starts, so she filled it in.
The doctor came in and corrected her mistake to the thyroid drug instead of an immunosuppresent drug. He confused me a little by talking about catching it early but then saying it runs it's course over a couple years. For 90% (and he implied women rather than general Graves population--is it only in women?), the effects will not be long-term; it goes into remission. So I have remitting relapsing MS and remitting Graves? For the other 10%, he has to do surgery to correct their eye issues.
Yep, that's right, I'm in another lottery. He could tell by looking at my eyes that I have Graves, and you can too, if you know what to look for. I have lid retraction but no protrusion. It's so subtle that I think most people probably don't even notice, but it could get worse. If it goes from being an inflammatory issue to being more permanent, then surgery is required. He felt that I am most likely in the 90% who don't need surgery.
During his exam, he was looking for pain or discomfort when I move my eye to the extreme directions and I did have a little when looking up. He said that some twitchiness I had around the eyes was from the insomnia, which I had when I was improperly medicated for my thyroid. He suggested that I would have to use drops to keep my eyes properly lubricated while I have active Graves.
I did tear up a little during our discussion. I mean, really? What the hell else can be wrong with me? WTF!? My eyes used to be one of my favorite features (I was an awkward kid so there wasn't much to choose). My mom has crossed eyes and, as much as I look like her (it's a little scary for me really), I always thought, at least I have my eyes. I'm obviously being punished for being a terrible wicked person. Even if no one else notices, I will notice now, all the time, that my eye is wonky.
After my torturously long visit, I went to get lunch. I had planned to eat out so that I wouldn't have to talk to coworkers after a doctor visit AND trying to get over my bad attitude, so I had looked up a couple places. In retrospect, even though it was in the wrong direction and a little more pricy, I probably should have gone to Nourish123 since I know that I can eat safely there. Instead, I went to a Vietnamese Noodle place.
I asked the helpful lady about dishes without wheat/gluten or soy. The curries have soy, the pho do not. She pointed out a vegetable stir fry dish with rice that would be fine, so I had that with chicken, and a glass of green ice tea. I also had some spring rolls and she brought me a chili sauce instead of the other peanut sauce that usually comes. Everything was very good, but could have used more spice--it didn't really have any spice at all--and I had some to take with me.